This is a continuation of an earlier post titled 33 Tell-Tale Signs You’re a Closet Designer. You might want to read that one as well!

1. Your nickname in high school was “The Butcher;” not because of your uncanny ability to manhandle giant slabs of meat, but but because of your quick witted comebacks that verbally cut anyone to shreds who dare tried to impose their unsolicited opinion on why you should be going to school for something practical, like accounting, instead of what you wanted to study–art, philosophy, anthropology…the mating habits of bats.  Knowing you, you wanted to study all four and then some.  Okay.  Maybe the bats were an exaggeration.

2.  You’ve been known to watch TV and repeat everything said in an Italian accent.

3.  You’ve got so many things going on, you can’t understand where the hell people get the time to build a freaking imaginary Facebook farm, or why, for that matter, this would ever be appealing in the first place.  You damn well know you wouldn’t want a real farm; why would you want a fake one that can’t even provide milk, eggs and a pleasant aroma on a daily basis?  Subconscious longing to escape the rat race, perhaps?

4.  You don’t cry much–unless there is a death, or no WIFI.

5.  You love people watching, and often make up complete life scenarios about the people you see.  Since most of them are on their way to the office, you know you can’t be too far off track.  Especially when it comes to romance; after spending 80 hours a week kissing someone else’s butt, who has the time, energy or saliva required to kiss anything else?

6.  You lie awake in bed at night, your mind racing with all of the things you want to do, and how you can possibly accomplish them.

7.  You always kinda wished Crocodile Dundee were your long-lost uncle.  Especially so he could show you how to do that thing with the knife when being mugged in foreign countries.

8.  You think “freedom from societal pressures” is just as valid and, apparently, as necessary as “freedom of religion,” and think it would make for a nice amendment to the constitution.

9.  You can’t decide if plain white bed sheets fill you with zen, or fill you with boredom.

10.  You would get amusement from pouring water in your hand, making a sneeze noise and then throwing water on the back of a person’s neck on an airplane.  Then again, this might be more of a tell-tale sign that you’re an asshole.  Either way.

11.  At some point, you’ve considered how to hi-jack and better optimize the entire Avon sales operation.

12.  Even though you think Hannah Montana is a little twip, you love the lyrics to her song “Life’s What You Make It:”

Things are looking up anytime you want

All you’ve got to do is realize that

It’s under your control

So let the good times rock n roll.

13.  You’ve felt guilty about dedicating more time on a hobby that you love, instead of “important things” like balancing your checkbook.  Wait, do people still do that?

14.  Door-to-door let-me-impose-my-dogmatic-thought-on-you irritates you more than running out of Frank’s hot sauce (no?  Just me?); you view prescriptivism as about as archaic as your granny’s girdle.

15.  You giggle at those people that constantly ring the buzzer on an airplane for the flight attendant–didn’t they know to buy an obnoxiously large bottle of water, 4 packs of Twizzlers and the special edition, I-survived-the-Philadelphia-airport snuggie before boarding?  Amateurs.

16.  Most people, upon hearing the word “nomad” think “hunters & gatherers.”  You think, “wireless & where’s-the-closest-place-I-can-buy-clean-underwear?”

17.  In high school Geometry, you could never figure out the value of continually trying to prove the angles of a shape; shouldn’t we be trying to prove things that we don’t already know?

18.  If you were to have a child, this seems like a feasible option:

19.  Most people feel more liberated to have a new car; you, on the other hand, feel more trapped.

20.  You wonder if you’re normal.

21.  When playing Super Mario Brothers, you always wanted to find ways to warp to other worlds.

22.  You think the most under-recognized most awesome place in the world is the library; within those walls lies all of the collective knowledge of the human race, to date, and if you just took the time to digest it, it has the power to make you indefinitely more superhero-esque.  (Be sure not to skip Kierkegaard, Nietzsche and The Kama Sutra.)

23.  You think there’s no such thing as a rebel without a cause.

24.  There’s something about people with dreds that you admire.

25.  You’d rather bathe in cold water, fending off cockroaches than work in a Coach, Louie Vuitton or Versace store.  At least cockroaches don’t have thousands of dollars of surgically enhanced body parts that you’d rather see spent in better ways. 

26.  You’ve never been a big reader of directions.  Viva la aventura!

27.  You’d be willing to get paid in experiences.  You might already.

28.  You can think of 20 different things you can do with a sarong.

29.  On more than one occasion, you’ve thought that if given the chance, you could have helped Bob Ross, that sexy animal, rise to new heights of success.

30.  You ask the question that everyone was thinking but hesitated to ask.

31.  You’ve have to wrestle a Dream Zapper (DZ) or two.

32.  You’ve wrestled an alligator.

33.  Just kidding–enough with the Crocodile Dundee references–I haven’t even wrestled an alligator.  But I might.

What else might you do?

I sat down the other day and began thinking about what it truly was that I wanted to accomplish in 2010.  But before I could come up with any meaningful goals to set, I had to think backwards about what things I ultimately want out of life, and what mini-goals I could set for the upcoming year in order to contribute to those big picture goals.

I wanted to share this with you as you sit down to think about what 2010 is going to be about for you, and hope it inspires some meaningful reflection.  Here’s to a thought-inspired new year, filled with lots and lots of ass-kicking.  If you haven’t started putting your aspirations into action, now is the time.  Stop whining and get out there and do something!

I started writing, and this is what I came up with: A letter to my future self that allows me to talk candidly to myself and outline exactly what my expectations are for myself in life.  And yes, I do hope to live to be 90…as long as my liver can keep up, that is.  It seems that whatever foreign country I’m in, there’s always a beverage worth sacrificing my motor skills on a semi-regular basis.

Dear 90 Year Old (Hopefully) Non-Denture Wearing Self,

How’s it going, you sexy thing you?  I sincerely hope that by now you aren’t covered in wrinkles, smelling like moth balls and pinching people’s cheeks. And if you are doing any pinching, make it a worthwhile pinch, preferably some dashing young man’s buns.  Always go for the gold; he won’t hit you–you’re 90!  That said, I also really hope that you aren’t rocking one of those beehive do’s that seem popular with people your age.  I might be able to overlook the gingham print mu’u mu’u dress, but not the hive.  Anything but the hive.

Anyway, I’m writing to see whether or not you ever got up off your tush and did something with your one precious life. You’ve always had so many different ideas you were juggling at the same time, it was hard to keep up.  But that’s what I always liked about you; whenever you saw something you wanted, there was no holding you back.  I hope you haven’t lost that fierce free-spiritedness about you, Ambirge.  It was always one of the things, if any, that I thought would surely bring you success. Or at least some damn good stories to tell.

The last we spoke, you were in your mid twenties and were optimistic about the world and all it had to offer, and all you had to offer it.  You had a certain zest for living life–and as much as you could of it–at all times.  You were never one to let the moment pass you by, from the time you jumped into the hotel pool still fully clothed in your business suit (national meetings at corporate headquarters always were enough to drive you to do something to make sure your spirit was still alive in there, somewhere) to the time you decided on a Friday to fly from Philadelphia to San Diego for the weekend to have dinner with friends, you never did let any grass grow under your feet.  I think at one time you may have even convinced the Jamaican waiter in Ochos Rios to give you a kiss, just because you thought he was cute.  And I blush to even mention the guy from….ah, just nevermind that.  Are you still doing things for the sheer pleasure of it?  Or have you become stiff, uptight, and guilt-laden for indulging in things purely because they’re fun? I hope not, Ambirge.

Professionally, you were going through a bit of a transition, if I recall correctly.  Though now that I think of it, you were always going through a transition.  It seemed as if no desk job was ever big enough for you; you often became restless and were in a continual state of transition as a result.  I remember once telling you that you should probably settle down at some point; you snapped right back at me and said you refused to stop until you finally found something that lit up your soul and fueled you with passion.  Something that you ached to do when you weren’t doing it, and something that you’ll be honored to dedicate your life to. Though, in the end, I think you’ve probably realized that you never had to be just one thing; you can be many things, and derive satisfaction in different ways from each that, together, harmonize to be the you that you had imagined.  Did you find that passion?  More importantly, was your life representative of the things you were passionate about?

Regardless of what you’re doing, or where you are, I want you to know that as long as you were able to wake up every morning and be excited to get out from under the covers, then you did something right.  If you were able to pass by others on the street and greet them with a sincere enthusiasm that just springs right out of you, manifesting itself as a warm smile and contagious energy, then you did something right. If you were disappointed to see the sun set each night, because you didn’t want the day to come to an end just yet, then you did something right. And when the sun did set, if you were able to dance all night long to the beat of nothing more than your heart, then you did something right.  And I’m proud of you.

I can only hope you have followed the advice I gave you long ago: The moment in which even one of those things becomes untrue, you owe it to yourself to keep exploring your options until all four are true.  The details always work themselves out. That’s important to remember, because if not, everything will have seemed overwhelming and you’ll become paralyzed by that.  Were all four true for you?  Are you simply excited to be alive?

Furthermore, as a side note, I hope you never, ever, ever compromised your aspirations for the sake of a significant other.  Because if you were actually their significant other, then you would be significant. And by extension, so would your aspirations.  Never live incompletely just so you can complete someone else. You aren’t a martyr.  You’re an awe-inspiring human being with the capabilities to do great things.  You must live as one, and I genuinely hope you have taken advantage of that fact.  Have you lived completely, and without regret?

You probably remember me saying over and over that there is nothing to be scared of, because no matter what happens, everything will always work itself out one way or another.  I remember seeing a vague sense of fear in your eyes, masked by your eternal enthusiasm, the last time we spoke and that’s perfectly natural…but I hope you have been careful never to let that fear have an impact on your decisions.  It can water them down, water you down, and water your life down. And who wants a watered down version of anything?  I hope you have been a stiff glass of bourbon, created to make an impression…not the Shirley Temple, non-alcoholic version of yourself.

If there had been a secret photographer, photographing one image of you every single day throughout your entire life, would the final slideshow be something you’d be proud to show to others?  Would it be one that made you smile with nostalgia to flip through, or weep with bitter regret?

If there had been a secret writer, writing one story about you every single day throughout your entire life, would the final book be something you’d be proud to have others read?  Would it be one that made you laugh with fond remembrance as you pour over each word, or yawn at the repetitiveness and lack of fresh, invigorating experiences as you indifferently skim through the pages?

If there had been a secret videographer, videotaping one clip of you every single day throughout your entire life, would the final movie be something that you will have been proud to have starred in?  Would it be one that you’d recommend to others, or one you’d suggest skipping?

Whether you had thought of it this way or not, every moment you spent, every decision you made and every experience you did or did not allow yourself, all collectively come together to construct the slideshow, the book and the movie of your life. Are you proud of yours?  I hope so, because you only get the chance to make one slideshow, one book and one movie – no rewrites.  Fortunately, even though you can’t go back and edit, you can always change the plot for the future.

I guess the most important thing to ask yourself is this: Are you happy?  Do you have any regrets?  Have you done all that you had hoped for? And are you at peace with the way your life has turned out?

Your death is certain, but your life has been a choice.  Here’s to hoping you have lived it, Ambirge.

With love,

Your sassy, less wrinkly twenty-something year old self

P.S.  I still think you messed up by never going to find that Spanish guy from Barcelona.  90 or not, you should probably go get ‘er done.

Luck scares the crap out of me.

Contrary to common belief, luck is the one thing that has the power to completely, utterly mess up your life.

As much as I like the idea of getting lucky–especially while abroad, wink–the harsh truth is this:

Luck does not exist.

That’s not startling news though, is it?  Most people already know that.  Right?  Right.

So the question becomes:

Why is it that most people still place their lives in the hands of the tooth fairy’s cousin to run?

That’s why luck scares the crap out of me–despite the fact that it is make believe, and most people know that if they consciously think about it, the power it seemingly has in running people’s lives is alarming.  Many people live their lives hoping to get lucky, instead of getting out there, smearing on some eyeblack, giving life their best GRRR face, and making it happen. (I tend to be rather fond of my GRRR face, if I do say so myself.)

Fact: When it comes to achieving things, people don’t get lucky.  When we experience any type of success–however we define that for ourselves–it isn’t because we got lucky in the success lottery that day.  It isn’t because we were in the right place at the right time.  And it definitely isn’t because you were wearing a low-cut top that day.

But most importantly?

When we experience success it isn’t because we’ve worked hard.

Yeah, that’s right.  You heard me, cowboy.

Hard work might come into play later, but the real reason we experience any type of success is a simple yet often overlooked tiny little detail:

You first have to give yourself the chance.

Get out there!  Go get dirty!  Open yourself to opportunity!  TRY.

There are many dreamers in the world.  I’m certainly one of them.  And for those of you who read my Dream Zapper post over at Free Pursuits, you know how important I feel it is to protect those dreams.  However, it is far too easy to simply wish for this, and hope for that, and call those aspirations, when the fact of the matter is that is it 100% impossible to achieve those aspirations–or anything, for that matter–unless you put yourself out there first, and give it a try.

This is the simplest advice, but by far one of the best, I assure you.

Here’s an example.  I recently won an all-paid trip to Jamaica to stay in an all-inclusive resort.  Seems pretty lucky, huh?

Not lucky at all.  I did not win that trip because of luck. I won that trip because I bothered to take 2 minutes to fill out an entry form and put my name in the drawing while out dancing one night in Philadelphia.  I won because I opened myself up to the opportunity, instead of just walking by and thinking, “Oh, I’ll never win, anyway.  C’mon let’s hurry to the all-you-can-eat steak buffet before the line gets long.”

Relating this back to life goals, it seems too often to be the case that many don’t bother to “put their name in,” or simply try, because they’ve convinced themselves that there will always be someone out there who will be better, more deserving, etc.

And that kind of mindset can be devastatingly crippling to the potential that’s out there.  It’s also devastatingly false.

Luck and Lifestyle Design

In terms of lifestyle design, this becomes an especially important lesson.  The word “design” implies “deliberate intention.”  If you want the power to control your life and design the one you see fit, then…you must be deliberate and intentional. No big shocker there.  But luck?  That’s going to do you approximately zero good in this showdown.

As rad as it would be, you’re not going to get lucky and have a martini magically appear in front of you just because, you’re not going to get lucky and lose 20 pounds just because, and you most certainly will not get lucky and simply have the life of your dreams just because.

You’ve got to go out and hunt that *$&@ down!

I’ve found it useful to think not in terms of how much effort I’ve got to exert, but by how great the potential reward or benefits could be, and in that alone.  If something requires relatively little work, but offers a huge reward, this ranks high on my priority list.  If something requires more effort, but still offers an equally huge reward, this also ranks high.  However, if something requires either little or more effort and the end reward isn’t something I’m absolutely crazy about, then this ranks low in my priorities.  Voila, prioritized goals.

It’s all about examining what it is you want, assessing the various routes to take you there….and then not waiting for luck to kick in, but making it happen with a healthy dose of some sexy old elbow grease. Discard the idea that maybe if you start something, it’ll just fall into place.  It won’t!  You’ve got to make it happen, and follow through.  It’s as simple as that.

Even if you aspire to have a four hour work week (something that might rank high in your priorities), you’ve still got to put in the work now to get there later.  Sometimes the best rewards take time and effort, but that doesn’t make them any less valuable.  In fact, they’re probably more valuable, which is why you should be more willing to dedicate yourself.  But whatever you do, don’t leave anything in luck’s hands.  It’ll be the fastest road to my-life-sucks-ville.

If it’s something you really want, then the reward is always worth the risk. You want an action step?  You got it:  Go practice your GRRR face in the mirror until it’s good enough to rival those crazy dudes from the UFC (Ultimate Fighting Championship), and then make a phone call.  Not an email, a phone call.  Call one person who you think could offer you some good advice on whatever it is you want to pursue, and simply just ask for it.  People are often much more willing to help than you may think.  They’ll likely be flattered, and you’ll get the benefit of gaining valuable knowledge, making a potential contact, and getting you pumped.

Don’t forget to take notes.

Ready?  Set?  GRR face!  Go!

This is a guest post by Andrew MacPherson, author of the blog Rules Optional as well as Sail to Trail.  When he says that rules are optional, he means it; the guy lives on a sailboat and is known to wear a kilt!  Follow him on Twitter at @rulesoptional and @sailtotrail.

Just admit it… you’ve checked out online dating profiles. I’m not sure how many, but don’t try to play all “I did some modeling in college and everyone tells me I’m hot so I meet people simply by existing” with me. I know your kind, I’ve met them online… then dated them. Even if you’re going to adopt your I’m being totally serious voice and sternly tell me… “no Andrew… Honestly! I have never even once looked at an online dating profile”, it doesn’t matter. We live in a world of self-promotional profile construction. Personal branding to brazenly enhance your career or Create Trust and Authority in 10 Seconds or Less™ is the advice du jour on the holy-grail trail to social media diva-guru-maven-hood and internet riches. If you’ve mixed in the right levels of authoritative-passionized-trustism and transparency, you’ll surely be tempted to take the kid-tested, mother-approved online dating profile silver bullet shortcut to looking universally cool.

“I love travel!”

There are apparently only two kinds of people on this planet… Those who love to travel, and those who haven’t yet figured out how to update their Facebook info tab. To that, I channel Chris Farley and say, “Well whoop-de-freakin’ do!” It is totally impossible that so many people love travel to the point of using it as one of the three to ten carefully selected verbs and adjectives defining the fundamental fabric of their entire personality.

Traveling sucks.

Yes, the idea of travel conjures up all sorts of romanticized emotions and images. From the closet portals to Narnia to the escapades of Knights Who Talk Strategy Around Unconventionally Shaped Conference Tables to vampires with accents honed far over the distant horizon, we’re immersed in the idea that the sexy people like to travel. I have news for you princess, Fabio isn’t going to leap from the cover of your novel and ride into town on a horse to make you a… um… princess; He lives in Hollywood and is probably still busy giving shirtless motorcycle rides to Tom Green.

There is nothing romantic about the screaming child kicking the back of your seat on the dusty bus ride to Ancientruinsville. There is nothing sexy about disappearing luggage. There is nothing mysteriously adventurous about an airport shuttle to your hotel. There is nothing magically delicious about McDonald’s global fare.

Now, before someone tries to make this all about me, assumes I loathe travel, and makes a tangential comment encouraging me to quit, I’ll make my simple point: You don’t have to love travel to be cool or sexy or smart or live a fulfilling life. You don’t have to engage in X amount of travel either. Lifestyle design, along with other related communities, places an arbitrary emphasis on travel in much the same way as dating profiles. I haven’t signed my name on an apartment lease since two years before the launch of YouTube and I’ve felt I wasn’t moving far enough fast enough at times. If my lifestyle hasn’t eradicated the silent pressure to keep moving, I guarantee it’s stressing out at least four billion other people.

There’s definitely an allure to travel. However, that allure has approximately zero requisite correlation to lifestyle design. It’s too easy to see other people liberated by laptops and cheap global communications and assume travel is the best use of modern technology. Here’s a secret… I’ve found it just as liberating to sip a beer on a Tuesday afternoon at a cafe five blocks from home as on a Central American beach during a surfing competition (the beer in the PNW is better too). Here’s another secret… The people I talk to when sitting in a cafe during normal working hours in Seattle are two or three times more excited to launch deep inquiries into how I’m able to do it. Maybe that’s because they’re closer to escape than populations of other countries, but that’s a little presumptuous. Maybe they just feel the invisible hand of free-market capitalism pressing more firmly on their souls. Suppositions aside, the key is owning your location in the space-time continuum. Prioritizing independence from geographic location over blatantly selfish mastery of your own time is a monumental mistake. There’s a reason the phrase “precious time” has 2point8 million search results on Google. Don’t swallow the artificially flavored powder mixed with sugar water by getting this backwards.

Travel as a default or temporary endeavor wouldn’t be an issue if travel didn’t completely envelop the lives of its participants. The notion of taking off on a voyage of self-discovery comes with built-in seduction, but discounts the fact that travel is often draining. It can devour resources and time like nothing else. Culture shock is very real and it absolutely stifles personality development before its relent allows personalities to flourish.

Unfortunately, a lot of people have only vague ideas of how they’d behave if they could behave any way they want. This idea is typically shaped by socialization in ways that can’t even be felt until after the opportunity to experiment is available. Culture is so pervasive that it’s not even a reasonable expectation. In these instances, travel can easily serve as substitute distraction, precluding attainment of pure self-discovery. Not everyone wants to be a nature photographer or travel writer or adventurer. Many people would rather restore vintage trains in their workshop in North Dakota than schlep across Europe or swim in tropical waters. Full-time travel can prevent and obscure self-realization in many of the same ways a full-time job would.

Moreover, some of the people dispensing the advice to travel without question are themselves traveling because they hadn’t previously developed their own identity and chose the default route. Beware the conflation of experience and expertise.

For anyone attracted to the core concepts of lifestyle design but somewhat put-off by the apparent travel requirement… You are among friends. There is no travel requirement. What was meant as a shining example of what could be done with free time has typically been co-opted and elevated to what should be done with free time. Like all dogmas, the dogma of travel is a target open to skepticism.

If that’s not clear enough, here you go: I hereby grant you permission, by the authority vested in me by living on a sailboat and having been solicited by prostitutes in multiple countries, to enjoy wherever you are for as long as you damn well please without restrictions of any sort. I absolve you of any responsibility to undertake a quest of mythic proportions to validate yourself as an enlightened individual or successful human. I implore you to revel in the sublime beauty only attained by spending enough time in a place to pulse with its nuance. I do have one small demand request… that we might possibly hang out when I visit. It’s people like you who introduce amazing local knowledge to those of us burdened by the urge to leave only that we may someday return. You make destinations more colorful and home more home-ful(?). Despite the many grandiose tales of epiphanies in far away lands, we’re all secretly a little jealous… of you.

Andrew enjoys long walks on the beach, holding hands at sunset, and has climbed Everest blindfolded with his grandmother while saving a puppy to raise money for the homeless. He is skeptical of this whole online thing but his friends talked him into it so he’s just trying it out. He hates games and appreciates people who love to laugh and live life to the fullest. His hobbies include monopolizing attention at parties with spontaneous guitar playing and solving world hunger. He works hard, plays harder, and feels just as comfortable in jeans as a cocktail dress. If you’re not busy tomorrow night, maybe you could come over to RulesOptional.com so we can hang out.

Cold Lasagna Is A Personality Trait

I am eating my lasagna cold. Ice cold, as a matter of fact.  The cheese is not warm and gooey, the roof of my mouth rests easy knowing it mustn’t guard against impending second degree burns, and my mind does not drift off, like usual, to ponder just how much that flight to Italy would actually cost and whether or not I would be attracted to men in tight pants.

Well, maybe it does.  But just for a second.

At first glance, the mere fact that I’m eating cold lasagna appears entirely trivial.

However, if you’ve ever dug into a hearty meat sauce lasagna that suddenly springs a surprise piece of sausage on you, you’re well aware that this can be one cunning little dish.

You see, the fact that I’m eating cold lasagna is, in all actuality, more revealing than anything anyone could ever glean about me from a face-to-face meeting. It says more about me than my hairstyle, my outfit, my choice of words or the way I sometime snort when I laugh really hard.  (Stop it, it’s endearing.)

As I stand in the kitchen, clumsily scooping the frigid 3 x 3 square onto my plate, licking any remnants of ricotta from the spoon, I look down at it.  I look the lasagna right in its top layer, and think, “I could heat you in the microwave, you delicious little slab of pasta you. Yes, that’s what I’ll do.  I’ll heat you for 1 minute and 30 seconds, and wait in eager anticipation for the all-too-familiar ding that signals the start of most American family meals.”

But as I trudge toward the microwave, I stop.  Other thoughts rapidly invade my brain, faster than you can say Pinochet:

“I wonder what this tastes like cold.”

“Why doesn’t anyone ever eat lasagna cold?”

“Why doesn’t anyone ever eat anything cold?”

“Do high temperatures necessarily equate to better taste?”

“Maybe, just maybe, lasagna tastes better cold.”

“Hmmmm.”

“Well, I don’t suppose I’ll know unless I try.”

And with that I grab the salt shaker.

Apparently, My Hygiene Is Questionable

To answer the most pressing question, yes that was an epic fail: Lasagna definitely tastes better hot.  But I mention it because lately I’ve noticed this sneaky form of rebellion craftily weaving its way into my life, manifesting itself as things other than processed flour.

For example, just last week I found myself actually contemplating whether or not there might be some alternative to brushing one’s teeth.  Yup, no kidding.

“Isn’t there a better way to do this, or do I really have to do this twice a day, every day, for the rest of my life?”

Yes, I did actually ponder that, but don’t worry — I’m still Crest fully clean.  But what frightens me is this: Not only did I ponder that, but I even noticed a developing yearn in the back of my head to deliberately skip brushing my teeth right then and there and go to bed without doing so…just for the sheer thrill of it.

Thrill?!  Yes, thrill.

I know, it’s a bit insane.  And dirty.  But I couldn’t help but think that the nature of brushing one’s teeth on a daily schedule from now until the day your heart stops beating is actually a bit daunting – and as much as I enjoy clean mouths in general, I’m now finding myself with a strange urge to rebel against these tiresome little life obligations. It seems as if anything that requires routine is suddenly a target.  I am shifty.  I am restless.  I require constant mental stimulation.  And I hate being obligated into mental passivity.

And when I am?

I act out.  I rebel.

The toothbrush example is inconsequential in the big picture; such small, recurring instances have begged a far more important question to be addressed, one that’s been clanging around loudly in my brain the last few days:

Is it the case that we rebel against something because we truly do not like it,
or do we secretly rebel for the thrill of rebellion itself?

Rebellion Is The Preferred Behavior ‘Round Hurr

If extended beyond the age old question of to heat or not to heat, to more meaningful aspects of our lives, such as whether it’s prudent to leaving one’s job in favor of a more fulfilling lifestyle, I’d argue that it’s a combination of both.  Rebelling against something in the name of a preferred alternative is certainly warranted, but I would also argue that rebelling against something for rebellion’s sake, or the thrill that accompanies it, holds unsuspecting merit despite its futile appearance.

Here’s why: The act of rebelling against certain societal assumptions, expectations and demands, for example, is the product of critical thought. And it’s only by thinking critically about everything we do, are we able to reach a higher level of consciousness, free ourselves from the confines of group thought, and thrust ourselves forward.

I do not believe that many of the things we are taught to do in life are done because they’re the best way to do them.  I believe that they are done because they are popular.  What makes them popular is another matter: Sometimes it may be because something is effective, but more often than not, it might simply be because something is easier.

Case in point: 9-5 is much more popular than entrepreneurialism.  It is easier to go to work for someone else from 9-5 everyday and do what you’re told, than it is to think critically about something that might make you happier, and then put in the time and effort to go and get it; however, it’s likely not the most effective means of creating an income or finding self-fulfillment.

Side note: This isn’t to say that there aren’t people out there who are fulfilled by working 9-5 and doing what they’re told; there are.  But the fact of the matter is, however, that there are plenty of people who aren’t, but are doing it anyway for lack of direction’s sake.  It is this group that I speak to, and I want to make that clear because I’ve received a number of private messages questioning my purpose as of late.

This scenario points to a butt-naked truth: As a whole, we would rather be comfortable, than fulfilled.

(Did I just go from lasagna to nudity?  Why yes, yes I did.)

Here’s what I hope you take from this post

Think critically about everything.  Just because everyone else is doing it, does not, by any means, mean that you should, or have to.  Determine your path based on what makes the most sense to you.  And whatever you do, do not let your voice get drowned out by the voices of others when it comes to your life.  It’s yours for a reason.  Do something with it.

On a personal level, I am continually assessing the value of everything that I do. I’ve noticed that many of the things that either other people ask me to do, both directly and indirectly through set expectations, or things that I’ve simply been doing out of habit are, in effect, absolutely pointless. Many of these things are simply not effective in terms of time management or skill management or happiness management, and more often than not, there would be absolutely zero long term effects if a given task weren’t carried out.  And, if that’s the case, then why spend the energy doing it?  Why not dedicate my best and brightest brain cells to doing something that will have a lasting impact?  And why don’t you?

Ambirge Update-o-Life

That said, I wanted to take this opportunity to give you all a quick update on my upcoming plans.  This Tuesday, I’ll be leaving for San Jose, Costa Rica, and will be spending some time in Central America, reading, writing and consuming copious amounts of sugar cane-based alcohol.  This will not affect my regular posting schedule, but may influence my Twitter activity and ability to respond to comments as quickly as I have in the past, so I ask for your patience with that.  But I will respond!

I’m looking forward to creating some great content for you while there.

In addition, you can expect a killer guest post this upcoming week from Andrew MacPherson, author of both Rules Optional (http://www.rulesoptional.com) and Sail to Trail (http://www.sailtotrail.com) that I’m confident you’ll enjoy, if not obsess over. Andrew lives on a sailboat (jerk), is one of the world’s best and brightest ass-kickers, and is sarcastic as hell to top it all off.

Yes, he actually does live on a sailboat.

With that, here’s to best wishes for a wonderful holiday, everyone!  Cheers to a 2010 full of excitement!  Egg nog, anyone?