Comments on: Give Me Liberty, Or Give Me Death – Fate Versus Choices

By: Karen

Karen — Tue, 16 Nov 2010 22:22:00 +0000

Ok I just stumbled on your blog and am catching up on archives. I disagree with this one. Yes, people need to take more responsibility for their lives. BUT not everything is within your control to choose. My favorite example is my own personal sob story. When I was 11, my dad walked out on my family and chose not to have contact with me (while this choice had some two-wayness to it, damn it, I was 11!) for the rest of his life basically. There’s a LOT more to it I found out as I got older but that action of his shaped me as a child and as a person in a lot of ways…and yet I had no choice in it! I can choose how I act/react now and whether I let my parents’ actions have the same effect on me but the fact remains that I had no choice at the time. And the fact remains, we all have circumstances at some point where choice is not a factor. We can always choose how to react and perhaps that’s your larger point. But there are times when other people make choices that effect us or weather happens or events coincide and natural laws take over…what we do with these is our choice but the initial is NOT.

By: TMFproject

TMFproject — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 10:00:41 +0000

Fantastic point! Well-received!

By: TMFproject

TMFproject — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 04:00:41 +0000

Fantastic point! Well-received!

By: TMFproject

TMFproject — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 03:00:41 +0000

Fantastic point! Well-received!

By: Bigredtomato

Bigredtomato — Mon, 16 Nov 2009 07:43:17 +0000

If you haven't got enough money, then there's two ways to deal with this. Earn more money or spend less money. Everyone assumes that they need to earn more, but quite often spending less will get the same resort.

By: TMFproject

TMFproject — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 14:34:31 +0000

Perhaps harsh, but I find myself annoyed when someone dies, and everyone comforts using “everything happens for a reason.” No, Auntie Dorothy died because she ate artery-clogging saturated fat everyday while alternating with a pack of Marlboros. I've had a lot of people die, so this is not because I'm simply insensitive to that. I've probably had more people die by age 21 than people do in their 40's. But the point is that those phrases are purely crutches that people use so they can avoid negative feelings. Everything does happen for a reason, but it's usually not the one you'd like to believe.

By: Andrew MacPherson

Andrew MacPherson — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 18:56:47 +0000

You know the thing where someone is having a bad day because of a car accident or some other event and someone else tries to make them feel better by saying, “well… everything happens for a reason” and opines about not knowing what the reason is but they're sure there is a reason so everything is fine so in so many words “buck up little camper”? It's adorable that they're trying to comfort someone, but it always makes me want to launch into a philosophical tirade. Then I remember that someone's minivan has been damaged and perhaps now is not the time.

I first used that overstrike thing in a post that I legitimately updated. Using it in any context seemed cheesy at first, but adapting it for use as the other voice in my head is kinda fun. I have a suspicion that I stole that usage from someone else, but let's just chalk it up to fate.

By: uberVU - social comments

uberVU - social comments — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 13:48:37 +0000

Social comments and analytics for this post…

This post was mentioned on Twitter by TMFproject: New Middle Finger post: Give Me Liberty or Give Me Death (Bow Chicka Wow Wow) http://bit.ly/RaMTR...

By: Brian W.

Brian W. — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 13:40:36 +0000

Win: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Existentialism
Fail: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance

And yeah, I think things generally do happen for a reason. Just not the dumb way that people use that phrase. You didn't bomb the LSAT because you were meant to find your calling as a yoga instructor. You bombed the LSAT because you didn't want hard enough. The hurricane didn't come through because you were meant to move to California, you just happened to be in the way of physics.

Now, if you wanted to move from hurricane alley to California all along, use can use these seemingly random occurrences to justify things your heart wanted all along. And I suppose that's ok. Just rather roundabout.

By: Nate

Nate — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 12:58:25 +0000

Dude, you hit it head on. Personal accountability is the key to moving forward. Too many people think that someone else is going to bring change to their life. It's not the case. Take responsibility for where you are. Once you realize YOU are the one who made the conscious decision to be where you are you'll start being a lot happier.

Now, i'm not going to be idealistic here and say that changing at that point is easy…it usually isn't. But personal responsibility is definitely an important first step in the right direction.

By: TMFproject

TMFproject — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 12:11:50 +0000

Yes, if I constantly believed that anything I did had no impact, and in the end some other unknown external force was going to have the final say anyway, I can imagine I'd find it hard to remain motivated. Why would you bother doing anything at all?

By: TMFproject

TMFproject — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 12:10:05 +0000

I love it! My “sweet experience.” I've just come to find that spending money on experiences is just so much more worthwhile than anything else you could possibly buy, so I try to keep that in perspective. As much as I love going out and doing x, y and z, I need to be conscious of the impact it's having on my personal goals as well. I admit that in the past I haven't always been as “responsible” with my money as I perhaps should have been, but usually it's been in the name of doing something cool, and even if I have to endure some financial strain as a result, it's always worth it.

By: Royce Fullerton

Royce Fullerton — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 11:35:31 +0000

“If you want to go hit the town tonight and spend $100 on overpriced cocktails and cover charges into clubs full of sweaty, questionable people wearing sparkly lycra, go ahead. Alternatively, you could skip tonight’s meat market and put that $100 toward a plane ticket fund”

I thought about this a lot when I was living in Chicago, especially on Sundays with regret on how much I spent over the past two days. I called it my “sweet experience” fund. Bars/clubs and taxis around all night are such a money suck.

By: Oscar - freestyle mind

Oscar - freestyle mind — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 11:30:23 +0000

I totally agree with you. I don't believe in fate and a lot of people use it as an excuse to avoid doing something. It's easier to complain than to take action.

By: TMFproject

TMFproject — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 11:08:37 +0000

Hey, Jamie! I liked your take on things, and definitely believe in following one's intuition 100%. I suppose the only difference is that I would be inclined to say, “I made this fucking terrible decision, BUT ITS OKAY, because I needed to learn about what it means to make a fucking terrible decision,” versus a causal relationship in that x happened because of y. I think of them as two separate and distinct things, because I'm sure there are lots of times when you might say, “I made this fucking terrible decision, but I've already made this one in the past and did not need to relearn it. Shoot, maybe I'm an idiot,” in which case x did not happen because of y, x happened because I was an idiot. [And I made that choice!]

Ha, listen to us philosophizing. We'd be way better at this over 3 bottles of wine at some quaint little outdoor cafe on some sexy cobblestone street. And then straight to the club for sweaty, questionable men!