ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

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The Greatest Form of Suffering of All: Inaction

In: Finding Your Voice

Once upon a time, I was feeling stuck.

If my suspicions are correct, many of you reading this might feel the same way right now.

You can't get motivated.

You aren't excited about anything.

You're tired all of the time.

Lifeless. Indifferent. Apathetic.

You've stopped caring—about yourself, about your goals, about the things you used to.

You weren't always this way; at one time, you were optimistic, driven, determined, confident and generally happy with the direction your life was going.

And then it happened.

One minute you were doing pirouettes all over life's dance floor; the next, you're plopped on the sidelines, watching with bitter remorse as you witness others have the spotlight.

You know that all you have to do is hoist yourself up off of the wooden floor, strap on your ballet shoes and force yourself back onto the floor.

But you can't.

You don't know why, but you feel weighed down by something.

It's as if there's a secret ball and chain attached to your tailbone, and every time you try to get up, the force of gravity is too much for you to bear.

And so you sit on the floor.

Wondering if you'll ever get back up. Wondering if you'll ever dance like you used to. And thinking that maybe, just maybe, if someone were to give you a helping hand, you might be able to at least stand.

But no one comes to your rescue, which disheartens you even more.

You realize that it's all up to you.

You just don't know if you're up for the fight.

So you sit on the floor some more.

And maybe you cry. And maybe you get mad. And maybe you try to forget about it altogether, and just make peace with a life sitting on the floor.

Not everybody dances, you tell yourself.  As a matter of fact, most people don't dance—most people sit on the floor.

This comforts you. You decide that if everyone's sitting out, then sitting out can't be that bad.  It is easier, after all.  You expend so much less energy.  And—look on the bright side—now you'll never have blisters again, you muse.

There's just one eensy, weensy problem with sitting out the rest of your life:

You want to dance.

Dec 30

2015

On Becoming Unfuckwithable

Dec 30, 2015

Unfuckwithable. If you’re contemplating themes for the New Year, I highly recommend borrowing this one. Rolls right off the tongue and deep dives directly into your ovaries. But more importantly? We need this. We need this because there are always going to be days—weeks, months, years—where everything feels hard. There are always going to be […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Dec 31

2010

Resolutions Are For Chumps. I Choose Revolution.

Dec 31, 2010

All the things you think you need this year, you don’t. You do not need more determination.  You do not need more discipline.  And you certainly do not need more diligence. Are you kidding me? You are a Westerner–you’ve got plenty of that.  Why else have you gotten up every single day and begrudgingly gone […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Dec 28

2012

Forget Your Manners.

Dec 28, 2012

It’s polite to: …fulfill your obligations. …answer them back right away. …nod in agreement. …go with the flow. …do as you’re asked. …drink because they are. …take their call. …give your undivided attention. …fill the silence. …and always be there when they need you. Then again, no one’s ever done anything remarkable by always being […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Jun 8

2017

A Tiger Doesn’t Ask Permission of the Gazelles to Sprint

Jun 8, 2017

Stop giving a shit about the stats. So you don’t have any subscribers? Who cares—you don’t need subscribers to put your best work out into the world. You don’t even need a website. Just start. Surprise—I’ve had a few thousand people unsubscribe since I started doing daily emails. Guess what? I’m doing it, anyway, full […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Oct 26

2017

Sometimes, Being Difficult Is an Act of Devotion

Oct 26, 2017

Nobody wants to “be difficult.” Those words have stigma tattooed right across their rear. Just hearing them makes you think of that psycho in line at the grocery store, berating the cashier for not accepting her expired coupon. (She’s also wearing Uggs, for the record, and DEFINITELY has a soggy cigarette hanging out of her […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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May 27

2017

The Anti-Trump Bar: The Way You Stand Out is By Standing UP

May 27, 2017

There’s an AWESOME new creative cocktail lounge in New York City called Coup. All of the profits are being donated to organizations being threatened or defunded by the current administration. Tips are donated, too. Guest bartenders are flying in from all over the world, no charge, to donate their services. And guess what? There are lines […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Jul 31

2014

Anytime You Question Yourself, Promise Yourself Better Answers.

Jul 31, 2014

You ever do that thing where you’re about to start that business, write that book, ask for that advance, release that product, pitch that service, or maybe just tell your boyfriend you want to try anal…and then you hesitate? Flinch? Get nervous? Worried? Scared that the response is going to be something like, “WHAT ARE […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Dec 3

2010

The 67 Emotions of Unconventional Success: My Story

Dec 3, 2010

OBLIVIOUS When tears silently fell from Elizabeth’s cheek upon finding the note from her lover, 3 days before their daughter was born that read:  “I’m sorry. I can’t do this.” ASHAMED When classmates asked where my daddy was. I lied & told them he was Crocodile Dundee, and had to be in Australia to tame […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

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But no serial killers. I promise I won’t send those.

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