Tired of Having A Neverending To-Do List? Use It To Your Advantage

You don’t have time for anything.

You’ve got five tabs open on your browser, glaring, bold-faced emails that require responses, glaring, bold-faced bosses that require answers, and a family that, later, will require your last tattered, surviving joule of energy, before you hurriedly run an Oral B across your choppers, pray that there’s a clean pair of sweats (please let there be sweats!), and bellyflop face-first onto your bed, whose sheets really could use a good washing. If only you had the time.

As you lay there, your mind sprints a 100 yard-dash through a mental purgatory of phone calls to return, errands to run, cards to remember to send, functions to attend, appointments to keep–did I get my car inspected on time?!–basketball games to cheer on, gym time to log, whether or not you can still pull off spandex, and why on earth anyone would buy a pair of those plastic neon sunglasses with the lines through them.

You turn, toss and kick the tangled covers off of your feet in a child-like fit of frustration. You don’t have time for anything.

In fact, you barely have time to read this. (And I barely had time to write it.)

Back in the office, you won’t have time for a lunch break. (And your boss won’t have time to read the report you’ll spend your lunch break typing.)

You won’t have time to cook a healthy meal for dinner. (And your doctor won’t have time to answer your questions regarding your impending hypertension.)

You won’t have time to be intimate with your significant other. (And your significant other won’t have time to end it with you face-to-face before leaving.)

You won’t have time to take a vacation this year. (And when making layoffs, corporate won’t have time to notice.)

You won’t have time to go the speed limit. (And the paramedics won’t have time to revive you.)

You won’t have time to live your life. (And your life won’t have time to create many memories worth remembering.)

And thereafter, your friends won’t have time to mourn, before they’ll hastily rush back to work in fear of “falling behind,” as they, too, skip their lunch breaks and forfeit their vacation in the name of getting ahead.

At what point did productivity become worth dying for?

At what point did we stop feeling, and just start doing?

At what point did our lives turn into a never-ending assembly line, where the work is never done and we are never done?

And at what point did we become okay with it?

Using The Neverending To-Do List To Your Advantage

Granted, in line with basic human needs, there will always be something else to do in the name of survival. Kill-woolly-mammoth-for-food, for example, or generate-income-to-purchase-food, for a more relevant example. Add on an assortment of self-inflicted obligations on top of societal ones, and juxtapose them with present-day standards of living, and you’ve got yourself one heck of a to-do list–one that, no matter how hard you try, will never, ever be complete. Until you’re dead, that is.

As daunting as that seems, the fact that life’s to-do list will never be complete is, contrary to instinct, to your advantage. So is the fact that you’re not dead, in case you haven’t had time to notice.

The advantage is this: Since there’s always going to be something else to do, forever and ever and ever and ever and ever, so help me Jehovah, Jabbodah, Jeremiah or Jay-Z, it logically follows that it would be impossible to get everything done.

And if it’s impossible to get everything done, then why are we in such a hurry to achieve an impossible goal? (Overachievers. Sheesh.)

The Point

SLOW THE (INSERT EXPLETIVE) DOWN!

AND JUST BECAUSE I REALLY LIKE CAPS AND THIS SEEMS LIKE A LESSON WE COULD ALL BENEFIT FROM IF WE MANAGE TO GET IT THROUGH OUR CUTE LITTLE OVERACTIVE CEREBRUMS, I’M GOING TO FURTHER THAT STATEMENT IN ALL CAPS WITH THIS:

STOP RUSHING TO YOUR DEATH.

In my view, we could all really benefit if we could learn to reprogram our internal Tom-Toms from “fastest route” to “scenic route,” because otherwise, we will arrive much sooner than we ever imagined, without having seen any of the pretty lakes, rivers, valleys, fields, forests, deer, wild boar, or David The Gnome. And wouldn’t you jump at the chance to see David The Gnome, even just to give him a high five for that sweet red hat?

That sounds like I’m promoting drug usage. I’m not. I don’t…I just…I just….ah, forget it.

This Is Not New Information

When it comes down to it, it doesn’t matter how many ridiculous metaphors I use, you already know that you have to slow down. We all know that. You’ve probably had mini heart-to-hearts with yourself over the years, telling yourself the very same thing. You’ve made promises to read more books for leisure, spend more time playing Mario Kart with the kids, take long, drawn-out baths and maybe even try yoga.

So why haven’t you?

You fantasize about putting the world on pause, hanging a giant “Do Not Disturb” sign right on that which is your life, and curling up with a Harlequin romance. (Don’t deny.)

But you can’t, right?

Because there’s no remote control for the world–not even a mute button–and if you hesitate for even a moment, someone will come along who’s better, faster, more capable than you, and before you know it, you’ll be left in the dust.

That’s the fear, isn’t it?

Guess what: It’s time to wind up big and give that fear a fresh one, because the only thing that’ll be left in the dust is your guilty conscience. Bring on the Harlequins, I say.

While it’s true that we will always have something to do, and it may feel like we’re working on a 24/7 assembly line with no end in sight, that doesn’t mean we can’t kick the conveyor belt down a notch and take our good, sweet time. Periodic dance parties purely optional. Henry Ford is not behind you with a whip. The only one rushing you…is you.

A Little Experiment

Try this:

Tomorrow, walk really slowly.

It’s that simple. Walking slowly on purpose always helps me feel more calm, in general, and forces me to slow everything else down. Give your brain the uncommon treat of being able to simply trot along peacefully, without having to race. Take the time to smell the air, and not just smell it, but really inhale it. Notice things. Notice yourself. Notice how you feel. Notice who you are.

Revel in the peace of mind & unexpected relief that comes with not having to be the fastest, if only for today. Let people think you drive like grandma and yell obscenities out the window. Who cares? Just crank the tunes.

Note: Might be useful to have a video camera on hand. Recording other people getting angry because you’re not rushing through your life like they are might prove to be disturbingly delightful.

Stop being impatient. Anxious. Intolerant. Demanding. Short. Tense. High-strung. Temperamental.

Take a deep breath, and slow it down, Gonzalez! Make a conscious effort, if for no other reason than it feels good. Despite appearances, you are completely in control of your time and how you operate. Don’t forget it. Getting the world’s most productive person award is not worth sacrificing the quality of your experience here on earth. Actually, it’s not even worth trading your black jellybeans for, since it doesn’t even exist.

Chill out. And in the meantime, you should definitely have a lasso on hand–after all, who needs a muse if you’ve captured a gnome?

If you liked that jazz. . .check out some of these:

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http://twitter.com/Mneiae Caroline L

One thing that my short stature impacts is the length of my stride. I walk slowly relative to just about everyone but the elderly. My stride rate is about the same, but when my stride length is compared to that of my friend Andy's stride length, it's about half. This is because Andy is 6 4. His waistband comes to my shoulder.

The point of the paragraph above? I naturally walk slowly. Perhaps that's why I'm almost the only one to notice the gorgeous campus where I live.

TMFproject

@CarolineL
This is so, so cool of you to mention here. What a neat thing–you don't have a choice to walk slow, so it's forced you to really be able to take in much more of the world than many people do. Rest assured, this is to your advantage. That's great.

Thank you for this!

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TMFproject

Funny you said that–I am responding to this from my Blackberry in my car as I wait for a girlfriend to meet me for lunch—I need to take my own advice!

Your comment was great (and it definitely doesn't matter when I posted something!) and I laughed when you talked about the inbox competition. Its so (eerily) true. I remember walking into the office and being happy to have a ton of emails, and if I had to guess, I'd say that its because it makes us feel important. To-do lists make us feel important, as if we've got important things to do (even if they aren't, in relative terms). Is this a a cruel game of narcissism?

52,000 emails. Ugh. I can only imagine how that person would be able to easily say, “I'm sorry, I just can't deal with this. I've got 52,000 emails waiting for me.” It's an indirect way of saying, “I am important. More important than you.”

Man, that was cynical of me, eh?

Thanks so much for the comment. Great points!
http://www.bradmarley.com/ Brad

I know you wrote this post a few weeks ago, but I just now discovered your blog and I am compelled to comment. This post, in particular.

For those of us who “live in our inbox” it has been become almost a competition of who has the most e-mail sitting in their inbox. (For the record, I've heard as high as 52,000.)

This, of course, begs the four questions you pose to the reader.

The answer lies, I believe, in coaching those you are in direct contact with to slow down and, like you said, stop reacting and start adding value. The world will not end if we don't work until 9 p.m. every night.

It's a matter of working on the stuff that's important, and weeding out what's unnecessary.

Of course, with everything readily available, it's easy to pick up your smartphone and answer an e-mail while you're in your pajamas watching American Idol. But as soon as you do that, you've set a precedent that cannot be reversed.

Anyway, I'm rambling. Great post.
http://www.bradmarley.com/ Brad

I know you wrote this post a few weeks ago, but I just now discovered your blog and I am compelled to comment. This post, in particular.

For those of us who “live in our inbox” it has been become almost a competition of who has the most e-mail sitting in their inbox. (For the record, I've heard as high as 52,000.)

This, of course, begs the four questions you pose to the reader.

The answer lies, I believe, in coaching those you are in direct contact with to slow down and, like you said, stop reacting and start adding value. The world will not end if we don't work until 9 p.m. every night.

It's a matter of working on the stuff that's important, and weeding out what's unnecessary.

Of course, with everything readily available, it's easy to pick up your smartphone and answer an e-mail while you're in your pajamas watching American Idol. But as soon as you do that, you've set a precedent that cannot be reversed.

Anyway, I'm rambling. Great post.

TMFproject

Funny you said that–I am responding to this from my Blackberry in my car as I wait for a girlfriend to meet me for lunch—I need to take my own advice!

Your comment was great (and it definitely doesn't matter when I posted something!) and I laughed when you talked about the inbox competition. Its so (eerily) true. I remember walking into the office and being happy to have a ton of emails, and if I had to guess, I'd say that its because it makes us feel important. To-do lists make us feel important, as if we've got important things to do (even if they aren't, in relative terms). Is this a a cruel game of narcissism?

52,000 emails. Ugh. I can only imagine how that person would be able to easily say, “I'm sorry, I just can't deal with this. I've got 52,000 emails waiting for me.” It's an indirect way of saying, “I am important. More important than you.”

Man, that was cynical of me, eh?

Thanks so much for the comment. Great points!

TheInfoPreneur

I use lists for my site, where to take it, post ideas etc. As for day to day stuff, if something needs doing I do it straight away usually. I know I know what a square.

It's not that I'm a control freak, I'm just so dumb i can't always read my own handwriting!

TMFproject

Sometimes being “a square” is a good thing. As long as you can morph into a triangle when you need to!

Ha, that was corny of me, wasn't it?

http://www.EatenByTigers.com/ Mark Eckenrode

and so i refer you to a recent SinFest comic: http://www.sinfest.net/comikaze/comics/2010-01-…

TMFproject

LOVE IT. Speaks to our tendency to fill empty time with empty activities, for lack of knowing what else to possibly do with ourselves. Would a little critical thinking solve this? Or is it just easier to bumble around through life?

http://www.wanderingearl.com/ Earl

Normally your posts get me pumped up to attack my to-do list with renewed energy, and now you're telling me to slow down? Seriously though, if I get too overwhelmed by my to-do lists, I often just toss them out. I then usually forget about at least half of the items on it when I decide to make another one. And of course, life still goes on and I survive, yet I'm no longer overwhelmed and I'm back to moving at a snail's pace…

TMFproject

I'm not the only one with multiple to-do lists that have the same items on them? Ha. I write things down so I don't forget things I want to do, but if I don't get to it today…then so be it! Tomorrow it is. Or the next day. Nothing is ever so urgent that you've got to put yourself into a state of mental exhaustion. Or physical exhaustion, for that matter. Right on – “life goes on and I still survive, yet I'm not longer overwhelmed.”

P.S. If your to-do list is also your dream-list–and not just a have-to-do-list, then DON'T SLOW DOWN!

http://twitter.com/bloominglater bloominglater

I wrote a long response that didn't show up in comments, but I don't have time to rewrite it. suffice it to say: I enjoyed this post. Especially the bit about high fiving the gnome in the red hat. Thanks for it.

TMFproject

Man!!! I had issues last week with Disqus, but thought it was taken care of. I'm so sorry about your comment, and disappointed I didn't get to hear your perspective! And…gnomes. I have no idea where I pulled that from, when I was writing this, but it just seemed to pop into my head! HA.

http://feint.me feint

Awesome advice Ashley – I found that days were blending into weeks, and weeks into months and suddenly half a year was gone. I came up with a simple system where I stopped working using weeks (a social construct) and instead based everything on one day at a time (0-365). This way there was no “fresh start” at the beginning of a week to be used as an excuse.

TMFproject

I love this. Technically every moment is a fresh start, isn't it? I'm going to contemplate how I can incorporate this mindset for a while, and see how I do. You're a smart cookie, Sir Anthony, you know that?

http://www.lifetoolkit.net/ Maria

Ash, I love this post!
I tweeted and FB it, and hope it will leave burning red marks in the brains of other readers.

I remember some 5 ys ago I was attending a life coaching class with 30 ys + coworkers. The coach asked “What do you enjoy?”
And I said “I enjoy the change of the seasons. I love to sense the first day of autumn, or spring. When the atmosphere slightly changes. And the shapes of clouds.”
Needless to say, I first got a “Are you kidding, or are you just frekkin' insane?” kind of look from my co-workers. Most of them family people, serious, with jobs, cars and houses of their own. Me, just a fresh graduate.
And then that look turned to envy. They started saying “Yeah, I know what you mean, but life's too complicated, you don't have time for these things…”
Really? You don't?

At times I also walk slowly to work. And still take time to notice the shapes of clouds. Sometimes I feel sad cause days have passed without me looking up. But mostly, I feel happy that I DO remember to notice the little things.

TMFproject

You're freaking awesome. You had me spellbound just envisioning what you were writing. This is exactly what I'm talking about–I just imagine that many people don't take a moment to allow themselves to be reflective like this and see the beauty that surrounds us, because they're too busy looking in through a narrow lens. This is the official call for wide-lens viewing, people!

http://www.freestylemind.com/ Oscar – freestyle mind

I actually ignore the tasks in my lists and focus on just the important ones. I don't mind if I procrastinate on low value activities, and yes, slowly down is tremendous advice

TMFproject

You would know better than anyone on how to prioritize – didn't you do a time log experiment to track your day and see where your time was going? Can you link us to that? (I looked on your site, but was unable to find.)

http://twitter.com/kjax Kent Jackson

Nice Ashley, you did it again.

I actually do have 5 tabs open, bold emails and bigtime “deadlines” for tomorrow (How did you know?), but I still found time to read your entire post, and take a minute (or 20) to comment on it.

My nine year old son was just saying this tonight… That he is too busy, he has no “time”, and after his Lego robotics competition on Saturday (we were on our way home from practice), the dramatization of a scene from “Chasing Vermeer” for English class that needs to be edited (Due Friday), the cub scout bowl-a-thon and his birthday on Sunday he will finally “have time”.

I had two things to say… first was “That's life.” With the exception of the English project, all of the other tasks he took on himself, because he wanted to and enjoys them. Then I asked him which of the things taking up his time he did not want to do… But he didn't have an answer.

The second was, it just seems like you will have time next week, but guess what? Soccer will be starting, you are on the crew for the talent show, the reading olympics, the Spring concert will require trombone rehearsals and if your team does well at the regional Robotics competition, you may be gong to Atlanta… Again, all of these things he wanted to do, even if it meant taking up all his time.

But my biggest question for him was “Time for what?” He didn't answer but I suspect he wanted to say “video games”.

Then I went into the “back in my day” speech about paper routes and football and ice hockey practice and how I wish I had the opportunities that he has. (I love giving those speeches, with an ironic smile. I hope he realizes I 'm being ironic….)

I didn't even mention to him that, because I help coach his robotics team and was the camera man for “Chasing Vermeer”, I was going to have to stay up til 3AM tonight in order to find the time to get my own “to do” list done. I'm not complaining, I love it, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I think the biggest lesson is to keep yourself busy with things that you truly want to do. We all have things that we “have” to do and getting the “have to's” done quickly or in batches actually frees up time for the “want to's” (Am I disagreeing with you here? I don't mean to, I'm on board, believe me). Additionally, If you don't allow yourself to have things that you “want to” do, the things that you “have to” do will expand to fill all of your time, almost like they are a gas expanding to fill their container. Welcome to misery.

I've always had a fascination with the fable “The tortoise and the hare.” The moral of the story never made sense to me. “Slow and steady wins the race.” I am referring to Disney's Silly Symphonies version of the fable. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DrKmpuKhKE. My argument in favor of the hare was this. While he did technically lose the race and he is a bit of a jerk, the hare just barely lost and he got to do all that other fun stuff along the way. He got to take a nap under a tree, talk to the pretty bunny girls, shoot an arrow off of his own head, play baseball, play tennis. Meanwhile the tortoise spent all his energy and time solely focused on the race with no extra fun and he only barely won. I aspire to be the hare, with a bit more humility and slightly better work ethic. But truth be told, if I barely lose to the tortoise but had a bunch of fun along the way, oh well.

I guess you could say I am practicing what I preach, with my “deadlines” looming I did take 10 minutes to read your post, 20 more to comment and 8:16 to watch the youtube video of the Silly Symphonies “The Tortoise and the Hare” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DrKmpuKhKE which I'm sure I haven't had time to watch since I was 9 years old. (Why not take 8 minutes out of your busy schedule and watch it? : ) ) .

Why did I just spend 38 minutes of my time? Because I “wanted to” and you inspired me. Now, imagine how fast I am going to crush that “have to” to do list.

Kent

TMFproject

Kent –

First of all, great to see you again! I want to sincerely thank you for such a thoughtful, well-written comment that really resonated with me, and hopefully with everyone else, as well.

I just finished watching the video, and think that the point you make about preferring to be the hare–with a little more humility!–holds a lot of water, specifically in reference to the outcome: You may not win the race, but you enjoyed yourself along the way. Which is more important? What a great message, and communicated via a medium–a fairy tale–that we're all familiar with, except we were raised to view it from a different perspective. While I certainly agree with the principle behind “slow and steady wins the race,” in terms of having patience, drive and stick-with-it-ness, I also think that it's important not to get too overly focused on one goal (that may or may not be that important, such as winning a race) that you forget to enjoy the rest. There was one line that specifically jumped out at me, and that was when the hot little bunny chicas were yelling to the tortoise to come play, and the tortoise looked back and said, “I can't, I don't have time! I have to win the race!” Or something like that. And isn't that essentially what is happening to all of us, in reality? “Hey, come visit me in South America for a week. You've got the money–you'd love it!” “No, I really can't. I just don't have time.” Really? You don't have time to live your life?

Really glad you stopped by to comment with this. Thank you, again! I'm humbled.

http://www.reachourdreams.com/ Jen

I felt more relaxed just reading this post! I have slowed my life down a lot and sometimes find myself wondering if I am not busy enough! I think it is ingrained from society that busy is good …mmm deep breathes!

TMFproject

Right? We feel such a heavy sense of guilt for not being busy – I'm going to assume this is largely a Western affliction. It seems counter intuitive, though, because as a Westernized society, we've developed ways of automating processes, speeding up production times, and eliminating most of the formerly required manual labor. If that's the case, then wouldn't we end up with a bounty of leisure time? Instead, we're busier than ever. What gives?!

unbjames

I typically have 2 things on my to-do list max (if I can help it, which is most of the time) … get stuff done without the mental short-circuit of facing an insurmountable 256237 tasks in a day!

And Ashley. Seriously. You need to write a book; you got “it” (i.e. writing talent)

TMFproject

Don't tease! Thank you for such a flattering comment. If you ever happen to come across any publishers…

And it seems logical to me to only have 2 major things of deemed importance on your to-do list – that way, you stay focused. But what to do with the other things that need to be accomplished but aren't a priority? Perhaps a secondary to-do list is in order? But then that just adds to the complication. I'm okay, as long as I can keep it in perspective and remember that it *doesn't all have to get done right now, right away, or the world might end.*

unbjames

I have an hour called “Power Hour” (go ahead and laugh, lol!), where all the little time consuming but necessary tasks get worked on … emphasis on stuff that can get done quickly, and for more onerous tasks (like rolling coins from my loose change jar for example), I spend 15 minutes max on those … once the hour is up, I enjoy life for the rest of the evening!

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http://www.danceproof.com/ dancePROOF

“At what point did productivity become worth dying for?” .. “And at what point did we become okay with it?”

Great quotes.

The walking slow experiment is something I've tried before, acting like you're 90 years old is the best thing I've ever experimented with. I took my experimentation further:
-act as if it's going to take you 10 minutes to reach that ringing phone across the room.
-act as if it's going to take you 5 minutes just to stand up.
-sit in a park for a good hour or two.

best one of all – “do nothing, absolutely nothing for a whole day, no tv, no cellphones, no emails, no walking… nothing”

TMFproject

I love doing nothing. In the past, I'd notice myself constantly seeking some type of mental stimulation, continually hopping from one task to the next to the next to the next, if only to fill every waking moment in an attempt to feel productive. I've slowly come to realize that we really don't have to be doing something at all times – it's common to experience a strong sense of guilt from doing nothing (since everyone else is doing something), but in my experience it's been worth battling for the sense of peace and tranquility that you'll receive in exchange…once you fend off the guilt.

katiekasz

So, as I am catching up with your blog posts tonight, I'll keep my comments on theme: things I learned in South America….

Life should move at the pace of Molasses (or at least really thick honey) and be just as sweet as it.

TMFproject

Why is it that I've never had Molasses? Agreed, KatieKasz. Agreed.

http://ryanstephensmarketing.com/blog/ ryanstephens

You've really hit the nail on the head here Ashley. This is a constant battle between my I want to be CEO of the world and I want to kick it with family and friends and coach summer league baseball personas. Like Ian, I typically make a to-do list the night before and then hope I get the most important ones done the following day. If 3-4 smaller tasks find their way on the next day's list “oh well.”

All I know is that I don't want to be one of those people who wakes up 5,10,15 years from now and wonders where in the hell my life went.

TMFproject

Nodding my head in emphatic agreement to your last statement – “I don't want to be one of those people who wakes up 5…years from now and wonders where in the hell my life went.” I have no idea why so many other people aren't absolutely petrified of that. Thanks for stopping by and leaving a comment– always appreciate a new voice. High five!

http://findyourselflost.com kristin norris

You've got me thinking, Ash. This is quite possibly the most dangerous thing I've done all day.

Personally, I am an Olympic level speed walker regardless of where I am, who I'm with or what I 'need' to get done. I just like walking fast. It makes my butt look nice.

If doing anything at hyper-speed has no direct benefit to the firmness of my tush, I am right there with you, take it nice and easy and enjoy the scenery.

(FYI, this comment is really coming out of my fingertips as some sort of dictation of the schizophrenic battle in my head right now.)

Fact Check: I totally do everything at hyper-speed. With the amount of caffeine I ingest on a daily basis….it would be hard not to.

BUT (in honor of the fabulousness of caps) I burst through the work stuff so the bold faced boss (which is also me) will let me out of work early (which happens more often than not) so I can run through the puddles and rain my caffeinated ridiculousness down on the city (conveniently of coffee and rain – that pun was not intended, but I'm totally leaving it because hitting the delete key at this speed would probably throw my browser into conniptions).

ALSO if I do all of this fast, the likelihood of affording the All American Blog Tour sometime in the schedulable future is far greater. Which I think you would have no problem standing behind.

TMFproject

Heels make my butt look nice! Unfortunately, they also make my feet hurt after extended wear. If the whole lifestyle design doesn't work out, we need to roll out a business plan for high fashion, comfortable heels–all Easy Spirit style. You make a good point about completing tasks quickly so you're left with more time for yourself at the end of it all, which I agree with, but I think the distinction is being conscious of your efforts to move quickly with an end goal in mind, versus moving quickly on auto pilot because you're overwhelmed and just a big giant hurried mess. Agree? P.S. AABT – maybe we should take the country on rollerblades. That has nothing, at all, to do with blogging, but….if heels make my butt look good, and speed makes yours look fantastic, then rollerblades must do wonders! Bauer, baby.

http://findyourselflost.com kristin norris

True story: I really want to be a Derby Girl. I am so down for a skate across the states! Blogging or no!

Definitely also agreed in the difference between working quickly for a goal and working quickly because you're endlessly behind. I find I ride that line (I'll let you insert whatever dirty joke your gutter head wants to put there) quite a lot and frequently find that when I feel like I'm rushing just to catch it, it's because I haven't any idea what sort of fun thing I'd be doing if I wasn't rushing through mundane tasks.

TMFproject

I'm head over heels for the way you put that last line: “…it's because I haven't any idea what sort of fun thing I'd be doing if I wasn't rushing through mundane tasks.” I'm sure that there would be more people doing more things…if only they knew what those things were. If that's the case, perhaps mindlessness isn't the issue, but rather thoughtfulness. Why does this make me sad?

http://www.thewaythatyouwander.com/ Nate

Wonderful. I really like that exercise you mention of walking slowly. I've done that exact thing a few times just to slow myself down when I feel like my day is getting out of hand. I usually am pretty laid back, so when things get crazy I freak out waaay much. So, really nice post. It had me laughing, which was kind of interrupting my efforts to finish this sandwich I'm eating, but it was worth it.

TMFproject

Fist pump! I've gotten so good at taking my time and not being rushed, that sometimes if I'm running late to something, it's almost physically impossible for me to hurry – even when I keep telling myself I should really move faster. Ha.

http://twitter.com/david_engineer DSW

I got rid of my cell phone. It helps. Believe me.

TMFproject

Definitely something I've considered! Bizarre as it may seem to some who think of having a cell phone as bringing added peace of mind, i.e. event of a car accident, in some cases, it's probably the exact opposite–not having one brings greater peace of mind. They've become such a fixture to the human ear, to the point of being on-call 24/7 to everyone and anyone. And that's just plain exhausting.

driftingfocus

I didn't have a cell phone for almost three years – my final year of college, my nomadic year, and the year I lived in Korea. It was really nice, actually. And, since everyone and their grandmother has one now, I guarantee you, there's always one nearby that you can borrow.

TMFproject

Yes! I grew up in a time when no one had cell phones…I didn't get my first one until I went to college. Those were the days, when a boy actually had to call your parents' house and formally ask to speak with you. Now, it's uncommon not to have one…but probably not an unhealthy decision, in the least. I'd like to try it out, at some point.

http://www.leashoptional.com/ Ian

I am typing this comment very slowly in solidarity of your point. You can't know from reading this that I have averages about two words per minute!

This is awesome, by the way. A real kick up the arse for everyone running around at a hundred miles an hour trying to get as much done as possible.

I don't even have a to do list. There's always crap to do. When I wake up I have one, maybe two important tasks that I set myself. If I do them, anything else is a billy bonus and if I feel like it then I'll swing from trees, jump in puddles or drown in the rain for as long as it takes for me to feel really alive again!

People complain too much.

On the flip side, I would really, really love to catch a gnome. I like gnomes.

TMFproject

I tend to write to-do lists in the morning, but it isn't exclusive to that one day alone – I usually carry around a pretty little tablet and I'll cross off or add to it as things come, but more just so I can remember to do certain things that do need to get done, like renewing a parking permit, for example. But I think the danger is when we let a to-do list manage our lives, instead of us managing it. Have you ever met those people that are like, “Oh, sorry…I can't make it to the funeral, I've just got too much to do.” Like, really? Where are our priorities?

LuckyBiker

“STOP RUSHING TO YOUR DEATH.”

An addendum – do away with people who are trying to rush you to your death. Bosses, significant others, friends, parents, other authority figures… They can be toxic.

In my opinion, 90% of the time the phrase “hurry up” deserves a hearty “screw you” in reply.

http://www.leashoptional.com/ Ian

I love clients that say that. “How long is this going to take?” or “Can you be quicker?”.

I smile, nod, and tell them it won't be too much longer. Then I take as long as is humanly possible to complete whatever it is they want me to do. Blame the computers. Blame email. Blame anything but I make sure they have to bloody wait for as long as I deem is necessary in relation to how much of a tool they have been to me.
TMFproject

That can be in true, especially in a context where making a big decision comes into play. It's better to do things at your own pace, regardless of outside influences. If you let other people dictate your actions, then are they really yours?