Category: Online Marketing

Being Fat, Getting Robbed + Some Shit You Won’t Want to Miss

So, it’s been brought to my attention that, apparently I’m a loud mouth. You see, my girlfriends and I are taking private salsa + bachata lessons 3 times per week, and in order to see where we’re royally screwing up, we got the bright idea to videotape ourselves. Three things have come out of this: The acute awareness that, jesus christ, my arms are way fatter than I thought they were. Thank you, artesian beer + severe lack of willpower.

25 Ways the F-word Can Help Your Business THRIVE

I came across this poster over at The Donut Project, and instantly knew this was something I had to share. You loved it, right? That’s what I thought. My personal favorite is, “Make me fucking care,” which is probably the best piece of marketing advice I could ever offer. Think about it. Then do something about it. Ballers gotta ball, baby. Which is basically a euphemism for IF YOU WANT RESULTS YOU HAVE TO ACTUALLY TRY TO GET THEM. Profound,

A Non-Cheesy Approach to Trusting Yourself More + Sucking Less

If I could identify one statement that you’re bound to roll your eyes at, it’s “Trust yourself.”– Because here’s the thing: Most of us, including myself at times, don’t know how to trust ourselves. We see that advice, and automatically file it away into the “cheesy, fluffy, woo-woo” category, the same as we might, “Just be yourself.” It’s all so intangible, impractical, vague, unspecific, and hard to take action on. But there’s a reason why you hear it so much,

Part II: The X-Rated Guide to Doing Everything Wrong, and Still Getting It Right

Brace yourself. I’m about to do the online equivalent of Jackie Chan leaping over a dumpster before round house kicking a 50 year old masked man right in the schnoz. In high heels. And pearls. And maybe a mini-skirt, if spectators are lucky. You can take that as a warning, and kindly X out now, or you can take it as encouragement to keep on reading. (Clearly I’m bluffing. If you X out now, I will totally judge you. And

The X-Rated Guide to Developing a Marketing Plan. Without Losing Your Mind. Or Your Shirt. Cuz That’d Be Awkward.

So. Today we’re going to talk marketing. Some of the most common things I get are:– I have no idea what my unique value proposition is I can’t figure out why anyone would listen to me I am clueless as to what it even means to “market myself effectively.”- Before we get into this, we need to talk about what marketing is really used for, and why you gotta dig in and get ‘er done.– In order to do that,

The Definitive, Step-By-Step Guide to Getting Off Your Butt, Finding Some Focus, And Jump-Starting Your Biz…So You Can Stop Feeling Like an Procrastinating Asshole (And Start Making Some Cashola)

Sometimes I make bad decisions. The time I decided to consume alcohol while on a date while ON CRUTCHES was one of those times. (Thanks for not even trying to catch me as my metal crutches went flying, Bob, you scumbag.)– But then there are other times, when my decision-making skills operate at peak performance. Like the time I went on a man-vacation, and vowed not to date for a year, so I could focus entirely on me and my

Fear, Not – Fear, Exposed Will Be Back. (Says the Series In Its Best Arnold Impersonation)

Dear You, Hi. It’s Monday. Typically on Mondays, you get to hang with a sassy new segment of Fear, Exposed. But because I’m semi-evil. And because I take pleasure in mystery. (Be glad you’re not dating me.) I’m suspending the series. Stay tuned to find out WHY. (Or don’t, but I must warn you that you’ll miss out on my bad jokes, frequent F-bombs, and overuse of the word “baby.” Not like child baby, but like, “Oh hell yeah, baby!”

The Secret to Client Attraction – Grey Goose Vodka, Baby.

When I say the words, “Grey Goose,” what automatically comes to mind? a) Purple fairies b) Your high school prom date c) Roseanne Barr d) Vodka As much as I’d love it if the answer were C, you probably picked D, vodka. Congratulations, you are correct. Whether prompted or not, most everyone who sees the words “Grey Goose,” will automatically think, “vodka.” Unless they’re twelve. Or Amish. The reason for that is pretty obvious. You ready? It’s because GREY GOOSE

Making Money As an Act of Philanthrophy

Because quotes are sexy. And so is money that feels good to make. BE SOMEBODY. “You want to be rich in order that you may eat, drink, and be merry when it is time to do these things; in order that you may surround yourself with beautiful things, see distant lands, feed your mind, and develop your intellect; in order that you may love men and do kind things, and be able to play a good part in helping the

Entrepreneurs: Show Me Your (Black Lace) Thong & Tell Your Story Like You Mean It

I have many beliefs. Like black lace, for one. Or a perfectly timed comeback. Or that no matter where I am in the world, coffee will always taste better through a straw. (I’m even inclined to call this more fact than belief.) You know, the important stuff in life. But there’s one belief in particular, one belief that has served to inform every aspect of my life, from dawn until dusk, til death do us PART. (Likely the only time