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146

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We Need You to Give Yourself the Job

Today I will drive twenty six miles on backroads, through crisp autumn air, past dairy farms and old Citgo stations, and up a giant hill to my alma mater, Blue Ridge High School, here in rural Pennsylvania. I’m speaking to a group of seniors. Hijacking their last class of the day as I hoist myself […]

In: Career, Creating, Success,

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494

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How to Introduce Yourself at a Dinner Party Like a Cool-As-A-Cucumber BALLER

“So, what do you do?” These are the words WE ALL DREAD, FAM. Even professional communicators—cough cough—who work online and write inappropriate blog posts and whose job titles can’t easily be corralled onto some adorable fucktard pin. This past week, however, I had the opportunity to reflect on the personal intro more than ever when I found myself at not […]

In: Business 101, Communication, Hard Stuff,

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372

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Sometimes Wonderful Can Still Be Heavy

I love throwing sh*t out. Love, love, love, love, LOVE it. I throw out high heels and curtains, jewelry and fine china. (Okay so I don’t actually throw it out. I donate it. But the point is, it’s goneeeee.) It isn’t just the physical stuff: I’m also (creepily) good at throwing out old ideas, old identities, and old dreams. […]

In: Career, Hard Stuff, Life, Success,

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516

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Know Who Your Haters Are

Tiffany’s doesn’t try to sell diamonds to a sixteen-year-old girl. Nor are they offended, nor worried, when teens aren’t flocking to their stores. Tiffany’s knows that sixteen-year-old girls most definitely aren’t their market. And I also imagine that, were a sixteen-year-old girl to proclaim that Tiffany’s sucks absolute DONKEY BALLS, they wouldn’t take it to […]

In: Branding, Finding Your Voice, Marketing,

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433

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One Big, Sexy Question for Instant Clarification On: What the Hell Do I Want to Do With My Life?

I was reading something on the Internet yesterday that was praising this woman’s work, and I thought to myself: there’s such a difference between doing work and having work. (And yes, I italicized “such” in my mind.) To do work is to take on a task, whoever’s task it might be. To have work, though—work […]

In: Career, Finding Your Voice, Life,

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How to Write the Perfect Cold-Call Email—Without Making Yourself Sound Like a Grabby Psycho

Psycho is a good word, isn’t it? Ditto psychobitch, which I really gotta use more. (WE ALL KNOW SOMEBODY…) But when cold-emailing a potential client whose money you would love to have—ahem—we don’t want you to be that person. Not only will you be deleted faster than Barr. David Newton Esq. of Nigeria, you’ll be […]

In: Communication, Freelancing, Marketing, Writing,

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HEY, FREELANCERS: Get Featured in My Forthcoming Book!

Yessssss, the delicious one being published by Penguin Random House, out there in the wild, coming to a bookstore near you! ⚡️ If you’re a freelancer anywhere in the world who’s hit the $50K, $75K or $100K+ benchmarks, I want to hear from YOU. I’m specifically looking for people who are out there kicking ass and […]

In: Business 101,

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439

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A Wee Little Heart-to-Heart on The Fear of Being TOO. MUCH.

You know how I know when someone’s lying to themselves? *chomps peanut* The way they write. I can tell a lot about about a person by the way they write—myself included. I know there are people who are all, “But wait, WHAT ABOUT GENUINELY BAD WRITERS?” to which I say, yes, I know, they are […]

In: Confidence, Finding Your Voice, Life,

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545

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Writing Books, Trusting The Fuck Out Of Yourself, And The Golden Penis of Website Builders. (In Other Words, A Total Must-Read, You Guys.)

It’s Friday and I have so many things to tell you! First of all, have you ever read Caitlin Moran? Because if you haven’t, you need to. She’s funny as fuck. And she’s smart as fuck. And she’s British as fuck. Annnnnnnnnd, the real reason I’m telling you this is because I met with my new UK […]

In: Book Publishing, Confidence, Creating, Finding Your Voice, Writing,

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924

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Nine Freaking Months. That’s How Long It Takes to Make ONE Episode of The Simpsons.

Nine months! Which, for the record, is the same amount of time it took me to learn how to operate a damn Keurig. (WHY IS IT SO TOUCHY?! THE CUP IS IN! THE CUP IS INNNNN, I TELL YOU!) So nine months to make a single episode of The Simpsons—which is definitely longer than you’d imagine, since it […]

In: Book Publishing, Creating, Success, Writing,

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