ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

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Marketing Is Fucking Weird, Isn’t It?

In: Online Marketing

Marketing is fucking weird, isn’t it?

Everyone’s really anxious about it all the time, and it makes lots of people go into hiding and never, ever, ever want to come out. (I think they imagine others looking at them and pointing and growling, “Youuuu dirty rotten slimmmmmmmmmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.)

But I gotta say: marketing gets really easy when you believe in your work. And when you’re proud of what you’re doing. And when you actually like your work. (Like my forthcoming book, I cannot WAIT to talk about that shit. But ask me to talk about the mating habits of bees, and I’m just not going to be enthusiastic, alright?)

I think sometimes people hate marketing, not because they hate marketing, but because they actually feel like frauds.

They’re “faking it until they make it,” because that’s what people tell you you’re suppose to do, except for one thing that’s really important in life, which is not feeling like a giant fake everywhere you go because it will come out in even so much as the smile in your photographs and then what? Of course you won’t feel comfortable selling something that you’re making up.

I’m not sure what this call to action is, because I don’t mean to be a shit head and make anyone feel bad about themselves, but I do think it’s worth considering that if you’re just doing it for the money, and not because you like it, or because you even believe in what you’re doing, then maybe we need to do some re-evaluating, here.

Why are we even bothering?
What is the use of doing something that you don’t want to be doing for the next six years?
Are you really sure you actually LIKE your work?

Because, man, if you don’t even want to talk about what you do, why would anyone want to buy it from you?

Apr 11

2014

Your Customers Already Told You What To Say.

“If you were a pizza delivery man, how would you benefit from scissors?” “Why is a tennis ball fuzzy?” “What is your least favorite thing about humanity?” “How does the internet work?” Can you believe this? There are innocent people getting clobbered with these kinds of interview questions in dimly lit corporate offices AS WE […]

1,922 READS
In: Online Marketing


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Feb 19

2014

Are You Peeing In The Sea of Sameness?

I was disgusted. She was the 11th person to pass by trying to peddle the same exact selection of sunglasses that ten other people had peddled just seconds before. “Senorita?” she said, tapping me on the shoulder from behind my table once more. I ignored her once more. She circled around me in case I […]

6,222 READS
In: Online Marketing


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Jan 27

2015

You Can’t Sell Tickets to The Titanic if You’re Marketing it as a Rowboat

Like it or not, people do judge a book by its cover. And that cover happens to include the words on the front. There’s a palpable difference between the words, “hire me” versus “engagement fees.” There’s also a difference between “buy now” and “apply now.” (Even though those “apply now” snobs drive me insane.) And there’s a difference between, “Cost: […]

1,540 READS
In: Online Marketing


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Apr 24

2013

Tired of Being Told To “Differentiate Yourself?”

Everyone tells you to be unique. Find your USP. Differentiate yourself. (Meanwhile, you’re all, “Stab, stab stab, I’m the same, I’m the same, I’m the same – how am I suppose to “differentiate” life coaching?) And so you take a drink, because these are the types of things that drive people to drink, and you […]

2,524 READS
In: Online Marketing


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Jul 6

2017

We Don’t Sell Those

There is a rose company, here in the UK, that doesn’t give a fuck that they don’t sell daisies. It’s delightfully refreshing, in fact. There are no apologies about it; no wishy washiness; no trying to cover all the bases. Just this base is fine, thanks. Notice the quiet confidence it exudes? I’m also betting […]

483 READS
In: Online Marketing


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