ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

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On NOT “Following Your Dreams”

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

You know, this whole “follow your dreams” thing is getting a little old, right?

Coming from me, that's probably surprising.

But the problem is that so much of it is fluff. So much out there encourages you to start “living the life of your dreams,” while frolicking on a big white puffy cloud and nibbling on a tray of bonbons. Let's all join hands now in our camel-colored moccasins and braid one another's hair while singing to the god of daydreams, already.

The truth of that matter is that nobody knows what a damn bonbon is in the first place, and secondly, that nobody knows what their “dreams” are, either.

Did that sound like me yelling? Because I was totally yelling.

Here we are running around like a pack of rabid tortoises, drooling all over ourselves and trying, with no avail, to become all “enlightened” and “free” and “happy” and “zen” and “I-don't-know-why-I'm-doing-this-but-I-only-own-100-things-ish-because-clearly-I'm-not-a-good-person-if-I-own-more-than-one-pair-of-shoes.” (Assuming tortoises wear shoes, of course.)

I guess that's what they call a movement. Movement…crusade…tribe…cult…still-not-thinking-for-ourselves.  Aaacck.

Anyway, back to the flock of tortoises. Here we are, trying to make like foxes and run into the wind, but WE HAVE NO IDEA WHERE WE'RE RUNNING TTTTTTTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

If the advice is to follow our dreams, how can we do that if we haven't first taken the time to figure out what those even are?

We're a fast food nation. We demand speed. We want everything on the double. And dreams are no exception. So instead of taking the necessary time to figure out what they are, we opt to dive into whatever we think might suit our fancy at the time. And then we're disappointed when we realize that—wait a minute—we aren't that crazy about this or that after all, and since we aren't crazy about it, we don't put the necessary time and effort into it. And if we aren't doing that, then nothing's going to happen: certainly not dreams coming true.

If we want all that sexy enlightenment and freedom and happiness and zen, we've got to take the time to figure out what path will bring us those things. Most people assume that they've simply got to do a little “soul-searching.” So they sit down, pour themselves a cup of coffee, do a little thinking, and then assume that they've got the answer.

If only it were that easy.

The only things that we know, are that which we've experienced. So in doing soul searching, we're actually performing an inventory of the things we've done in the past.

But what about everything else out there that we haven't yet experienced?

If you really want to increase the quality of your life, the key is not soul searching. The key lies in getting out there and doing things that you haven't done before. Because the things you've already been doing haven't been that compelling, or you'd probably be on the road to sexy happy zen land by now—or at least have a better idea of where it lies on a map.

It requires some guts! It requires some risk-taking. It requires new experiences. And it requires you to get off your butt and start doing something: not just thinking about what you might like. There's so much out there that you don't even know you like yet, and one of those things might just be the very thing you've been missing this entire time.

New is necessary.

 

Mar 9

2012

Blow Off Work Today. That’s An Order.

I’ve been thinking about joy lately. I don’t particularly care for the word; every word has its own personality, and the word joy seems to conjure up an image of an old lady with dentures and pearls. The word just feels outdated. Mothballesque, if you will. Nevertheless, the concept remains. It’s stuck in my mind ever […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Feb 7

2013

Paper In Your Coffee

There are some people who don’t get the whole concept of an assembly line. You know who I’m talking about – those hanyacks at the Starbucks who come up beside you at the milk station, their panties in a bunch, tapping their foot, doing the hokey pokey at 8 o’clock in the morning because they […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Jun 14

2019

If You Ain’t Feelin’ Your Work Anymore: HONEY, BURN THAT ISH DOWN.

So, here’s an idea: making money is not courageous. Anybody can ring a bell for twenty years. “Look, ma—I’ve been standing over here ringing this bell for two entire decades—durh, durh, durh—and I finally got a sticker!” Making money is a relatively straightforward consequence of showing up to breathe in the right place. Cause and […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired, Feeling Disillusioned With Life, Hate Your Job?

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Jul 30

2010

On NOT “Following Your Dreams”

You know, this whole “follow your dreams” thing is getting a little old, right? Coming from me, that’s probably surprising. But the problem is that so much of it is fluff. So much out there encourages you to start “living the life of your dreams,” while frolicking on a big white puffy cloud and nibbling […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

READ MORE >>

Sep 7

2018

One Big, Sexy Question for Instant Clarification On: What the Hell Do I Want to Do With My Life?

I was reading something on the Internet yesterday that was praising this woman’s work, and I thought to myself: there’s such a difference between doing work and having work. (And yes, I italicized “such” in my mind.) To do work is to take on a task, whoever’s task it might be. To have work, though—work […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired, Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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Sep 5

2012

Are You Going To Be Someone Who Does? Or Doesn’t? (Warning: Contains Least Amount of Swear Words Ever Written On TMF)

It’s 5am. I’m checking out of my hotel in Buenos Aires, and I’m hoping the $80 eye cream I bought is ACTUALLY HELPING ME NOT LOOK LIKE I JUST CRAWLED OUT FROM UNDER A MOSSY, EARTH-STENCHING, FUNGI-COVERED ROCK. Mostly because I knew AndrĂ©s would be checking me out–hopefully in more ways than one. AndrĂ©s isn’t actually his name, as […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Oct 22

2013

You Think The Stakes Are High Now? Please.

I wonder about people. Specifically about the 50-something woman speaking softly at the table next to me, telling another woman how she desperately wants to go abroad—because, verbatim, it would be the opportunity of a lifetime—but… And her words trail off. JUST LIKE HER DREAMS. Kidding. Dramatic doesn’t look good on me. But, really. What […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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