ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

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Strike “Newsletter” From Your Vocabulary: What To Say (Instead) to Entice, Compel + Get People To Opt-In

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

I'm not a badgerer—except when I am.

Like when the light is left on in the bathroom, for instance. Or those people who leave hunks of bread on their plate and then PUT IT INTO THE SINK. Or those other prodigies who insist on driving in the left lane while PEOPLE ARE ACTIVELY PASSING THEM ON THE RIGHT.

In sum, you don't want to marry me.

And while there's a plethora (you use that word way more as an adult than you ever thought, right?) of things I badger the poor souls stuck at my house for dinner with, there's really only one thing I (strongly) badger about when it comes to business.

The word NEWSLETTER.

If you've hung out here at TMF for any length of time (even 5 minutes), you've probably seen me rant about this word more than once. It's ugly, offensive, lazy, useless, trite and downright irresponsible of any business owner who's using it.

Because if you, as a business owner, tell me, as a potential customer, that I can have the luxury of receiving your oh-so-titillating newsletter if I give you my email address, you're playing me for a fool.

The word “newsletter” tells me that:

  • You think I'm ignorant (because I've never used the internet if I find the promise of a “newsletter” exciting)
  • You don't really care about me (because if you did, you'd put a little more thought into your message)
  • You don't really care about your business (because if you did, you'd have more strategy than that)
  • And you probably don't have anything interesting to offer (because if you did, you'd tempt me with that, instead)

Because, here's the thing.

You wouldn't put a book up for sale with no title, no description, and no way for them to know what it was about—and then expect people to buy it. And you can't do that when you're selling a relationship with you, either.

Because at the heart of it, that's what an opt-in is truly selling: A relationship with you. Not a newsletter.

So what's the alternative? Well, many things. But for now, try the following framework out for size.

Sit down and answer the following four questions:

  1. What do people get from having a relationship with me?
  2. How do they benefit from the relationship?
  3. What two things will they be able to do/achieve/have/accomplish from that benefit? (The more concrete the better.)
  4. What's one negative/annoying/sucky thing that doing/achieving/having/accomplishing will prevent them from ever having to do again?
  5. Optional: A light-hearted, fun, humorous negative/annoying/sucky thing that doing/achieve/having/accomplishing will prevent them from ever having to do again.-

Then, take your answers and plug-n-play them into the following sentence:

Enter your email below and grab my ___________________________(#1)
designed to help you _______________________________(#2)
and __________________________(#3)
—and never have to ____________________(#4) again.
(Or ______________________________(#5).)

So as an example, let's say you're in the DIY community, and your answers look something like:

  1. What do people actually get? Three free DIY design templates
  2. How do they benefit? They look (way) more pro
  3. When they look like a pro, they'll be able to: Get more inquiries and convert more clients
  4. So they'll: Never have to grovel for business again
  5. Or: Borrow money from their mother-in-law

Plug 'em into the framework above, and you'll end up with the following:

Enter your email below and grab my three free DIY design templates, designed to help you look (way) more pro, get more inquiries, and convert more clients—and never have to grovel for business again.
(Or borrow money from your mother-in-law.) 

And voilá. You've got yourself a much more compelling call-to-action than:

“Enter your email for my free newsletter.”

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I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

Enter your email address and I’ll send you my advice column every week sharing everything I’ve learned—and so much more.

But no serial killers. I promise I won’t send those.

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