The Blog

Jan 9

2020

Interview Me for The Middle Finger Project Book!

Jan 9, 2020

Oh my. I’ve just done something terrible. I mean, good terrible, but still pretty terrible. Is that a category? CAN THAT BE A CATEGORY? For the truth is that I, Ashley E. Ambirge, have just spent a lot of money—like, to the tune of fifteen-hundred baloneys a lot of money—on something I absolutely just impulsed […]

In: The Book

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Dec 12

2019

Sean Ogle is a Bitch. Wouldn’t It Be Funny If That Were the Title? It’s Not, This Post is Entirely About Me and You. WEIRD.

Dec 12, 2019

I’m going to drown the fucker in pickle juice. Yes, that’s what I’ve decided: humiliation by pickle juice. Except it won’t really be the pickle juice that does him in—it’ll be the whiskey. The whiskey that comes in a shot glass alongside the pickle juice, as any self-repecting Philadelphian knows. They call it a pickleback, […]

In: The Book

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Dec 3

2019

I’m The Least Spiritual Fuck On the Planet

Dec 3, 2019

Not that you didn’t know that already. Which is why if you come at me with chakras or crystals or dildos scented with patchouli oil, I will make a face that looks pretty much like I have just swallowed a baby rhinoceros hoof. Which might be possible, if you could see the kind of soup […]

In: Book Publishing, The Book

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Nov 29

2019

NOW AVAILABLE, OMG: Pre-Order The Book! Pre-Order The Book! I’m An Excitable Thirty-Five Year Old Woman Who Can’t Use Her Library Voice!

Nov 29, 2019

I should be wearing clothes right now. I always imagined that when I finally wrote a book and made the big pre-order announcement, I’d be wearing clothes. But alas, I did not plan on making this announcement from a Holiday Inn in Gibson, Pennsylvania (where obviously clothing is banned), and I certainly did not imagine […]

In: The Book

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Nov 25

2019

OH HELL YEAH: Book Pre-Orders Open at 6:24am ET on Black Friday!

Nov 25, 2019

It’s here! It’s happening! The moment that my eleven-year-old self and my cat* have been waiting for for years and years and years and years! THIS COMING FRIDAY MORNING AT 6:24AM EASTERN, we’ll be kicking off a very special insider’s-only pre-order campaign for THE MIDDLE FINGER PROJECT book right here in your inbox—so get ready, […]

In: The Book

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[{"code":"Omg
[{"code":"Omg
yes
yes
quit tomorrow before your brain shrivels into a sausage"
quit tomorrow before your brain shrivels into a sausage"
"label":"Fortune #1"
"label":"Fortune #1"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"Don't be ridiculous
{"code":"Don't be ridiculous
you SO already know the answer "
you SO already know the answer "
"label":"Fortune #2"
"label":"Fortune #2"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"If you have to ask
{"code":"If you have to ask
the answer is yes. Now buy my f*cking book."
the answer is yes. Now buy my f*cking book."
"label":"Fortune #3"
"label":"Fortune #3"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"YES
{"code":"YES
you're not that horrible of a person that no one else will hire you if things go wrong"
you're not that horrible of a person that no one else will hire you if things go wrong"
"label":"Fortune #4"
"label":"Fortune #4"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"You're a smart f*cking human and you're wasting your potential working for some fleabag named Dirk. BYE."
{"code":"You're a smart f*cking human and you're wasting your potential working for some fleabag named Dirk. BYE."
"label":"Fortune #5"
"label":"Fortune #5"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"Leave your stupid husband and *then* quit your job"
{"code":"Leave your stupid husband and *then* quit your job"
"label":"Fortune #6"
"label":"Fortune #6"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"Depends on how much you like working under a guy who can't spell urethra. The Middle Finger Project book can help you figure it out though! "
{"code":"Depends on how much you like working under a guy who can't spell urethra. The Middle Finger Project book can help you figure it out though! "
"label":"Fortune #7"
"label":"Fortune #7"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"Go
{"code":"Go
go
go
go! It's painful watching you completely underestimate the fuck out of yourself"
go! It's painful watching you completely underestimate the fuck out of yourself"
"label":"Fortune #8"
"label":"Fortune #8"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"Yes and tell your family who doesn't understand jack sh*t to go barbeque some weiners and come talk to you once you're a bazillionaire"
{"code":"Yes and tell your family who doesn't understand jack sh*t to go barbeque some weiners and come talk to you once you're a bazillionaire"
"label":"Fortune #9"
"label":"Fortune #9"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"YES
{"code":"YES
being responsible is overrated when it costs you the rest of your life"
being responsible is overrated when it costs you the rest of your life"
"label":"Fortune #10"
"label":"Fortune #10"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"UM
{"code":"UM
YES. thank you
YES. thank you
next"
next"
"label":"Fortune #11"
"label":"Fortune #11"
"win":true}
"win":true}
{"code":"If you don't quit
{"code":"If you don't quit
I'm going to call your boss FOR you and then how embarrassing will that be?"
I'm going to call your boss FOR you and then how embarrassing will that be?"
"label":"Fortune #12"
"label":"Fortune #12"
"win":true}]
"win":true}]