ASH AMBIRGE

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Don’t Cower. Don’t Make Yourself Small. Be Your Absolute Fucking Self Every Single Day.

In: Finding Your Voice

I need to talk to you about my obsession with pearls.

More specifically, I need to talk to you about HOW EVERYBODY LOOKS AT ME LIKE I AM A GIANT WEIRDO when I wear fifty strands and then wrap 'em round and round my neck.

Ditto when I wear a blazer to a soccer game; black lip gloss to a meeting; fishnets underneath a pair of shorts, or dye my hair grey on purpose.

It's not just a matter of personal style: I get side eye for a lot of things. Traveling so goddamn much. Not settling down. Having an unconventional career. Drinking my coffee through a straw. 😉

There was a point in my life when I would have felt…nervous about it all. Not my choices, necessarily, but the way they would be received. I didn't like people having an opinion about me. I didn't want to seem like I was trying to be contrarian. I mean, god for fucking bid someone thought I was wrong.

What I learned over the years, however, is that showing up as yourself, however you see fit, is the most important work there is to be done. We are all setting 1,000 different fires for one another, simply through example alone, and having the courage to be the most brave version of yourself matters. It matters because they *are* looking at you, and they are wondering about you, but more importantly?

They're wondering about themselves. They're wondering if maybe they, too, might be brave. And that's the gift of reflection that you're offering to the world—not an affront.

In this way, being an individual is one of the most generous things you can do, for it might seem like a quiet act?

But it speaks volumes.

Jun 15

2017

Having FUN Doesn’t Make You an Unprofessional Schmuck

Fun is underrated. We spend so much of our lives trying to get taken seriously, that fun becomes something we think of as shameful, dirty; something to be minimized in a professional setting. Giggles are juvenile; jokes are adolescent; anything more than a poker face threatens your status as “a respectable professional.” But that’s only […]

442 READS
In: Finding Your Voice


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Dec 30

2015

On Becoming Unfuckwithable

Unfuckwithable. If you’re contemplating themes for the New Year, I highly recommend borrowing this one. Rolls right off the tongue and deep dives directly into your ovaries. But more importantly? We need this. We need this because there are always going to be days—weeks, months, years—where everything feels hard. There are always going to be […]

39,146 READS
In: Finding Your Voice


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Nov 7

2015

Your Hatred is Wisdom

What is it? The thing you sighed with relief about this morning? The thing you didn’t have to do on a Saturday? The thing you exhaled about? (And maybe even shimmied around the room naked over. With this You Tube video playing. And at least two neighbors cursing you to hell.) That’s the thing.  Pay very close […]

858 READS
In: Finding Your Voice


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Sep 15

2015

Plan On Being Nervous, Brilliantly

Being nervous sucks. Your pulse races. Your brain blanks. Your hands shake like little assholes. You tell yourself to take deep breaths, but the minute you do, you then worry that the entire room can see the fact that your heart is, in fact, doing the electric slide up and down your rib cage. (God […]

1,466 READS
In: Finding Your Voice


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Dec 28

2012

Forget Your Manners.

It’s polite to: …fulfill your obligations. …answer them back right away. …nod in agreement. …go with the flow. …do as you’re asked. …drink because they are. …take their call. …give your undivided attention. …fill the silence. …and always be there when they need you. Then again, no one’s ever done anything remarkable by always being […]

795 READS
In: Finding Your Voice


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May 27

2014

Do You Have Chickenshititis?

I have a friend named Melissa. (Yes, I have friends.) Melissa doesn’t have a job. She spent her twenties and thirties working for other people as a professional headhunter–(am I obligated to make a Headless Horseman joke here?)–before finally going back to school to pursue an advanced certification in Human Resources. And then she waited. And she […]

1,977 READS
In: Finding Your Voice


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Jun 28

2010

Do You Have The Guts?

I can vividly recall the first time I wrote a resume. I typed away on our clunky, jumbo HP desktop, silently muttering words that shouldn’t appear in any resume each time autoformat would sneakily attempt to take over my painstakingly-created bulleted list of achievements. To this day, autoformat and I remain sworn enemies–and with reason, […]

4,066 READS
In: Finding Your Voice


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