ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

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25 Words That Will Make You Seem Bland, Useless, Stale, Dime-a-Dozen, Washed-Up and Otherwise Uninteresting, Unimportant and Not Worth Paying Attention To

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

If you want to stand out, feel fresh, appear interesting and get noticed…

…then you've got to use language that stands out, feels fresh, is interesting and gets noticed.

This is common sense, but of course, it's easier said than done. It's tempting to use the first words that come to your mind, but usually?

Those are the last words that'll make you stand out in anyone else's.

This is why good copywriting is so important.

The cutesy, overused, cliché phrases have gotta go. 

Ditto this shitty coffee.

WHY AM I STILL DRINKING SHITTY COFFEE? 

1. Guru

2. Manifesto

3. Solutions

4. Empowerment

5. Juicy

6. Rock (out) (on) (your world) (etc.)

7. Fempreneur (This one's for you, J.)

8. Thrive

9. Alchemist

10. Luminary (seriously?)

11. Epic

12. Shiny

13. Sexy

14. e-Book

15. Kick ass

16. Domination

17. Insanely ________.

18. Ridiculously ________.

19. Killer

20. Rocket science

21. Laser-focused

22. Freakin'

23. Bucket list

24. Remarkable

25. Newsletter

Please. If nothing else, ditch newsletter. This is a plea. A petition. And maybe even a prayer. Nobody is chomping at the bit to sign up for anybody's “newsletter.” I'm not saying not to send (an incredibly well-thought out + useful one) – I'm saying that this is not the language that gets results.

And language is everything.

Jul 20

2015

The Real Trick to Brilliant Writing

Jul 20, 2015

You know what makes for brilliant writing? Not what you say, but the way you say it. The execution. The way you jockey your message onto a page. There are 354 different ways to tell any story. (Exact figure, give or take a few thousand or so.) You can start at the beginning, or you […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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May 17

2016

Poets & Killers Get Rich

May 17, 2016

There are two groups of people: Poets & killers. The poets are running around with their heart placed firmly on their sleeve, hoping that if they do authentic work, it’ll sell itself. The killers, on the other hand, are running around selling everything, none of which is actually authentic, nor genuine, nor useful. (We call […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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Jan 20

2015

Clear vs Clever Copywriting is a Big, Fat, Bloated Myth (And a Scapegoat for Subpar Writers)

Jan 20, 2015

I’m a very dirty writer. Not Fifty Shades of Grey dirty, but dirty in the way that I put sentences, thoughts, ideas together. My process is wild. Sexy. Free. Undomesticated. And while I wish the reason were because I’m just such a clay-faced, crochet-bra-top-wearing, sun-worshipping bohemian soul (I am laughably not), rather, it’s because I […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet, Online Marketing

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Jul 15

2014

No, I Don’t Want to Be in Your Tribe.

Jul 15, 2014

“No, I don’t want to be in your tribe. I’m not your minion, and I’m not a cow.” -@ateegarden on Twitter. The internet popularized the concept of “finding your tribe,” and while Seth Godin’s book by the same name is right on the money, the term itself has become cliché, stale, trite, boiler plate, and fucking offensive. …As […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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Aug 4

2012

How to Make The World Give a Shit About You

Aug 4, 2012

::  When I first started having sex, I worried I wouldn’t be sexy enough–and that I’d be a sore disappointment. ::  When I worked in advertising sales, the first time I ever had to do a nation-wide cold-calling contest…I was so wracked with nerves, I sat at my desk shaking, sipping vodka from a thermos. […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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Dec 14

2012

Take Your Lazy Sentences And Piss Off. Politely.

Dec 14, 2012

Lazy sentences BOTHER ME. They bother me because it’s not really the sentence being lazy–it’s the person who wrote it. And if that person happens to be a business owner who’s trying to convince me to spend my hard-earned, sweat-soaked, time-drenched money with them? They better demonstrate that they actually WANT MY BUSINESS. Want it […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

Enter your email address and I’ll send you my advice column every week sharing everything I’ve learned—and so much more.

But no serial killers. I promise I won’t send those.

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