ASH AMBIRGE

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Funerals Happen Every Day When You’re Expanding

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired, Feeling Disillusioned With Life

I watched the movie AWOL last night, and the truth is, it was just an average movie.

But I was fascinated by it.

I was fascinated by it because the movie is set in Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania, where I grew up, and everything from the trailer to working at the ice cream stand was the spitting image of a life I once knew so intimately. It was like stepping back in time—the junk yard pick up truck; the boozy men; the sense that the world has left you behind. You know that life, but you can’t imagine it anymore.

I wonder if I knew then, what I know now. That every aspect of life is just a substitute for what’s to come next. That who you are is a mere temporary tattoo, because who you are becoming is constantly erasing and re-writing what’s done. Nothing is ever “done,” in fact. Done is an illusion.

It is at once both thrilling and wretched, this process of evolution. You must lose yourself to find yourself, over and over again. Forward motion is inevitable—that much is certain. Whether or not it’s progress, that’s a different question.

Change is not always growth, but growth will always require change.

Funerals happen every day when you’re expanding.

Mar 25

2012

Why Moderation is for Losers.

Growing up, my dad’s favorite line used to be, “Everything in moderation.” What a riot. One would assume that, after having those particular words-o-wisdom jack-hammered into my brain at least once per week, that I would have turned out, well, moderate. I’d think moderately, I’d travel moderately, I’d love moderately, and I’d live moderately. And […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Nov 18

2010

The Woman Whose Ass We All Should Be Kissing

If I had a foghorn, do you know what I’d shout? (Besides how I’ll never understand why so many people think that God is actually a compelling justification for their particular policy preferences. /rant) What I’d really shout—what I truly believe our people desperately need to hear—is this and this alone: The well-being of our […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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