The Commitment-Phobe’s Guide to Making a Decision When The Grass is Always Greener and YOU CAN’T STICK TO ANYTHING.
December 6, 2019
You ever do that thing where you're fidgety and restless and the grass is always greener and you're never really content with what you've got so you're constantly searching for some legendary “BETTER” that will make you rich! and skinny! and HAPPY! and one of those people who never craves pizza and always irons their shirts and arrives everywhere on time and even knows what their budget is? (People who have budgets dazzle me.)
I used to be one of those people. I still am, sometimes. But I made a rule for myself, a long time ago, that has helped. Because for as much as I don't like rules, particularly ill-considered ones, I like knowing what I think and deciding how I'm going to live and sometimes that requires you to firm up a few things beyond your glutes.
The rule I follow is this: the grass is never, ever greener on the other side.
NEVER. That's the assumption I operate under and I remember it at all times, especially when I'm about to do something rash. Because, listen, if you keep imagining that it might be greener, not only will you eventually end up checking yourself into a place called “Whispering Winds Recovery Center,” where they serve cold minestrone soup and play Mariah Carey's All I Want for Christmas in the dead of July, but you will never, ever be happy either because there is no such thing as “greener,” only “same green, different dog shit.” Everything you do in this life comes with its own set of problems. Everything is always going to have a set of negatives attached. So the real question is not whether something or another would be “better,” necessarily, but rather: will it come with problems you enjoy solving more?
Pick your problems, not your perfect.
Make your decisions based on the kinds of problems you LIKE—not whether or not there will be fewer of 'em. There will never be fewer problems, but there will always be fewer doubts in your mind that you're doing the right thing.