ASH AMBIRGE

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There’s No Such Thing as The Committee of True & Actual Greatness™

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

You know what’s the absolute worst? Waiting in line at the doctor’s office.

There’s a lot of anxiety around that, am I right? Nobody likes waiting at the doctor’s office because we all secretly think that the doctor’s just sitting behind a closed door somewhere, doing wheelies in an office chair, watching the minutes churn past with glee as they browse the latest in Pinterest gardening techniques while the rest of us waste away in a sea of plastic orange non-moveable chairs, watching somebody else’s kid struggle to make an alphabet block tower, listening to some loud talker named Rog while wondering HOW MUCH LONGER THE LADY ACROSS FROM YOU IS GOING TO HOG THE SPRING 2003 EDITION OF READER’S DIGEST.

Should I even get into the joys of waiting to get off the airplane?

The truth is, there are plenty of things in life that are going to require you to suck it up and just WAIT. We know this. We do this. We do this every day. In fact, we do it so much, that it’s slowly but surely become our default setting, because it’s easier to apply the rules across the board than it is to test them in every new situation.

So as a result, we wait to be told what to do all the time—even in situations when we don’t have to anymore. Even in situations when it’s actually become a clear and obvious disadvantage for us to wait any longer. Specifically, situations like your career. Because let’s be honest: if you’re hating your job / life /  work and waiting around patiently for “something good to come your way,” The Committee of True and Actual Greatness™—what I call the fictitious organization we're all secretly waiting for approval from—is never going to run up to you and say, “Hey, you know what? I’ve been thinking, and you’re really doing work that’s beneath you. But don’t worry, I’ve gone ahead and set you up with this brand new career, and you’ll even be your own boss, and you’ll be doing this remarkably fulfilling creative work like you always wanted. Here you go, kid! THE PLEASURE IS ALL MINE.”

Never gonna happen. You can wait all you want, but that little gem's never coming down the pipeline.

So why do we keep waiting for it to?

Why do you stroll through the halls of your office building waiting to be noticed? Why do you do the work that eats your heart alive, hoping that someone will give you a better opportunity…soon?

Ironically, waiting has become the new shortcut to certainty. And since WE’RE ALL SO DESPERATE TO BE CERTAIN ABOUT EVERYTHING, we’d rather wait around and torture ourselves every single minute of our lives in favor of feeling sure about something, anything, than we would make the change / take the leap / do the thing / try something outrageous….and risk not having that certainty to fall back on.

What’s not being acknowledged, of course, is that “certainty” was never something you wanted—until the day you forgot what you did.

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2 Minute Guide to Reclaiming Your Life

If you clicked on this post, you either: a) Need to get a grip. b) Want to reclaim your life. c) Have no time to do either. d) Googled “mating habits of porcupines” and this just came up. e) You read everything I write because you’re secretly plotting my demise. With the exception of letter […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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How to Be a Human.

I sat in a plaza yesterday, behind La Moneda–Chile’s version of The White House. Diagonal paths come from all directions and meet up in the center, before darting off in opposite directions. People walk gruffly, generally ignoring one another–cell phones, busy faces, stern looks, fast paces. And just like in plazas everyday across the world… […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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It’s Okay If You Suck At This. Otherwise Called, “Permission to Suck.” Otherwise Called, “Longest Blog Post Title Ever Because Obnoxiously Long Blog Post Titles Are Funny.”

It’s okay if…you’re drowning in self-doubt. It’s okay if…you don’t know where to start. It’s okay if…you started, but want to stop. It’s okay if…you sometimes mix up your priorities. It’s okay if…you didn’t say the right thing. It’s okay if…you really fucked up the first time around. It’s okay if…you fucked up the second time […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Marilyn Monroe Wouldn’t Give a Damn.

Remember earlier this year… …when I sauntered over to Ecuador and had a twelve year old pierce my nose, as well as agreed to having a random Ecuadorian man sit on top of me on the beach to doodle all over my back with a mysterious black, sticky ink? Maybe we didn’t know each other […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Listen: Do What You Crave Without the Guilt. Travel to Italy. Enroll in That Workshop. Make Your Art Every Afternoon. And Hurl Yourself Into the Unknown—For This Is The Best ROI That Money Can Buy.

My almost-mother-in-law gets really fucking nervous when I travel—especially when I bomb off to South America for a month by myself to drink ALL THE WINE and celebrate ALL THE BOOK DEALS. But she doesn’t get worried in the typical way a mother might; not the way my own mother would have been worried, which would […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired, Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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A Conversation With An Immigrant on U.S. Life

I had an insightful conversation with a Mexican immigrant the other day. We also might have had a round of margaritas, which could have enhanced the perceived value of the conversation, but nevertheless, I wanted to share it with you. It went something like this: ME: So, I imagine you came here with some expectations […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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