So last night I did what any young lady would do whose internet has been down since Friday and, as a result, is staying in a randomly-selected hotel to mooch mega-bytes:
- Wondered what the fine would be for accidentally stealing one of these “firm” pillows–these things are fucking impressive.
- Side-kicked the air-conditioner upon discovering there was no mini-bar. (Random hotel selection = bad idea.)
- Contemplated how much a baby St. Bernard would cost, whether or not I could find one in Costa Rica, and decided that his name would be unequivocally be Fred. (Unrelated.)
- Watched this Ludacris video and fist-pumped to the lyrics, “Why tiptoe through life to arrive safely at death?”
- Felt up my eyeballs 42 times, trying to pry my desert-dry contacts off of my god damn cornea while not smudging my eye makeup. (Why am I a girl?)
- Had one of the best threesomes I've ever had. Over the phone. Topless. By which of course I'm referring to the live teleseminar I was a guest on last night, alongside of Erika Napoletano of RedHeadWriting.com, and Erika Lyremark of DailyWhip, on the topic of finding–and using–your voice in your writing. Which is clearly the reason I'm writing this entire post: To give you the link.
It was called Finding Your F-Bomb, and we talked about how to stand up and be counted. How to develop your writing voice. And how to make people give a shit about you. In sum, it was dirty, dirty talk. And I hope you'll have a listen.
Here are some of the sound bytes that came out of the teleseminar:
:: If people walk away feeling nothing, you've failed.
:: There's a huge difference between caring and obsession to the point of crippling yourself. (On knowing when your work is done.)
:: Provocative= poking holes into what some people perceive as truth.
:: It's about teasing out those moments that stop people dead in their tracks.
:: If you have to tone down the magic, you are working the wrong crowd.
:: Hey, what the hell are you doing with your life? Think about it.
:: The worst reaction an audience can have is indifference.
:: Find an unexpected way to say the expected.
:: One of your perceived flaws can be an integral part of your brand.
:: When someone calls you out on your bullshit, it's like you're soul mates.–