ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

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Calling Bullshit: The More You Fear Something, The More You Should Do It. Who Came Up With This Garbage?

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

I'm a pretty laid back gal.

One time, Steve Patterson spit in my face in the 9th grade, and even then I wasn't overly upset about it. (Come to think of it, what the hell?)

But, like any human being, I have buttons.

The most obvious is clearly when anyone mixes up “affect” and “effect,” because, you know, ONE'S A VERB AND ONE'S A NOUN.

Another thing?

This whole “I'll shoot you an email” trend.

No no no, actually, you're not going to shoot me an email. You're going to send me an email. Not accepting any email shooters today. Sorry.

It's possible that me and my new friend Chris may have just spent an entire 15 minutes bantering about that. Chris is traveling the world, and two weeks ago, he “shot” me an email when he got to Santiago, asking if I wanted to grab a terremoto.

He is currently cooking me and Kyle Hepp bacon.

Follow TMFPROJECT on Instagram. You will see our ways.

Last but not least on the Ashley Ambirge list of joy this morning?

This whole idea that the more you fear something, the more you should do it. “It's an indicator that you're onto something good.”

No it's fucking not.

In some cases, it's an indicator that it's A REALLY BAD IDEA.

There are approximately 159 better ways to make a decision. Like by doing, say, research. And actually getting educated on this big, looming thing you're shitting your pants about. Because usually, the reason why you're scared isn't because your big, looming thing is scary. It's because you don't know enough. It's fear of uncertainty; not fear of your big, looming thing.

And while we all know I'm the biggest supporter of jumping in head first, if you're hesitating that much, maybe you need to reevaluate.

It's that simple.

Because there's a difference between moving forward despite fear, and moving forward because of fear.

Make sure that big looming thing is actually something you want. 

And not just something you think you should be doing to “expand.”

Would you have a baby just because you thought it'd be a good fucking exercise?

No.

Same thing goes for business.

And steer lassoing.

Only ever do that if you're really, really sure.

Oct 25

2018

Be Brave, Courageous, Interesting, Crazy, Difficult, Weird, and Downright Complicated. But Don’t You Ever Be Normal.

Oct 25, 2018

You know what’s fucked up? Normal. Normal is so fucked up. For example, it’s normal for expats to drink daily in Costa Rica. This is a terrible idea, and yet, because it’s done over and over again, it’s become normalized. NO ONE WILL GIVE YOU THE STINK EYE FOR SLUGGING A BEER AT 10AM, Y’ALL. […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired, Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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May 11

2010

2 Minute Guide to Reclaiming Your Life

May 11, 2010

If you clicked on this post, you either: a) Need to get a grip. b) Want to reclaim your life. c) Have no time to do either. d) Googled “mating habits of porcupines” and this just came up. e) You read everything I write because you’re secretly plotting my demise. With the exception of letter […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Jul 12

2016

To the Woman With the Fake Smile: Stop It, You Fucking Pigeon

Jul 12, 2016

Can we all just stop, already? Stop apologizing. Stop saying sorry. Stop shrinking into some small little ball-less version of yourself—you know, so you don’t make all the other ball-less twats feel uncomfortable. Or risk offending somebody. Or do something controversial. Or doing all of that and then totally screwing it up and feeling stupid. […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Aug 31

2010

Slugs, Angel Hair Pasta & Vespas, Or, The One Thing That DOES Define You In This Life

Aug 31, 2010

So, I’m sitting in the bar at this restaurant. I’m lovingly twirling my fork into a steamy, lemony, buttery, most delightfully angelic heap of angel hair–the creamy, makes-you-throw-your-head-back-with-glee kind of pasta that, I was thinking, should probably be forbidden for nuns, because, I swear, this pasta is far more decadent than the best sex you […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Sep 7

2018

One Big, Sexy Question for Instant Clarification On: What the Hell Do I Want to Do With My Life?

Sep 7, 2018

I was reading something on the Internet yesterday that was praising this woman’s work, and I thought to myself: there’s such a difference between doing work and having work. (And yes, I italicized “such” in my mind.) To do work is to take on a task, whoever’s task it might be. To have work, though—work […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired, Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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Feb 7

2013

Paper In Your Coffee

Feb 7, 2013

There are some people who don’t get the whole concept of an assembly line. You know who I’m talking about – those hanyacks at the Starbucks who come up beside you at the milk station, their panties in a bunch, tapping their foot, doing the hokey pokey at 8 o’clock in the morning because they […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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Dec 20

2012

Always Do. You’ll Be Glad You Did.

Dec 20, 2012

If you walked in the door right now, I don’t know if I’d run and hug you hard, or if you’d seem like a stranger now. I’d like to think that I’d hug you. I’d like to think that I’d bury my face into your chest and you’d smell like your old cologne–which kind, I […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

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I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

Enter your email address and I’ll send you my advice column every week sharing everything I’ve learned—and so much more.

But no serial killers. I promise I won’t send those.

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