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Shattering the Current Model of Reality

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

Most of you reading this website are here because you want more.

Tried and true may be comfortable, but boring.  The traditional life path may be safe, but uninspiring.  The status quo is average, but nothing extraordinary.

You know there's something missing, but you can't pinpoint what, exactly, it is.

We've essentially been told for years that hard work pays off.  You've gone and done everything the way you've been told you were supposed to do it. We've been under the impression this whole time that as long as we put in our dues, we'll be rewarded, and handsomely. This was the model of reality we've built up in our minds, assuming that by following the rules, eventually the right of passage would open its doors to us, and we'd saunter on through in our Armani suit, whistling show tunes and brushing our shoulders off before asking someone to pass the Corvasier.

Unfortunately, the truth of the matter is that right now, you're lucky if you even have a job, let alone an Armani suit. Maybe you happen to be in that crowd.  If not, then chances are you're probably looking for a job. Or maybe you're one of the brave, who's elected to try and build an unconventional business & lifestyle.  Regardless of the circumstances, you haven't been able to quiet the small, nagging voice in the back of your mind that says, “Is this it?  Is this what I've been working for my whole life?  This?

But you make every attempt to silence that voice, because now that you've put so much time and effort into X career or Y life plan, you feel obligated.  You tell yourself that you're just going to have to stick it out.  And so you do.  But it doesn't get better.

The small voice eventually becomes a bigger one, reminding you that you deserve more. You start to resent that voice, and then start to resent yourself.  This is your one precious life, after all.

But just as soon as the thought pops into your head, you immediately hit a brick wall; you wouldn't know how to change it if you wanted to.  What's a person to do?  Go back to school?  Up and quit?  Stay and start a business on the side?  Exile themselves from the country?  Just say screw it, and sit at home eating buckets of fried chicken and Twizzlers all day long?

I've been in that position. Not the friend chicken and Twizzler position (usually), but the lost and confused and crushed position.  And man was it unsettling.  Frustrating.  Disillusioning.  Heartbreaking.

Others have asked themselves these same questions, too. Take Colin Wright of or Andi Norris of  Both of these cool cats started out doing out doing something entirely different than what they're doing now.  Yet somehow, all of us have managed to jump oh-so-gracefully over that little disheartened hurdle, and leap into something that, after taking some inner inventory, made more sense for us.  We're now doing things that we like to do, because, well, we like them.  And isn't that the point?

But more importantly, we're doing things we like to do because we gave ourselves permission to go ahead and do so. To not be afraid to scrap it all and start over.  To teeter on up to the edge of something new, poke it in the side and say, “Hey. Let's take some risks, you big, Santa Claus – esque imaginary metaphor, you.” To put ourselves out there, recognizing that the universe can never say yes, if we never ask anything of it.  It's a go big or go home mentality, and it's literally saved our lives.

Nov 6


It’s Okay If You Suck At This. Otherwise Called, “Permission to Suck.” Otherwise Called, “Longest Blog Post Title Ever Because Obnoxiously Long Blog Post Titles Are Funny.”

Nov 6, 2011

It’s okay if…you’re drowning in self-doubt. It’s okay if…you don’t know where to start. It’s okay if…you started, but want to stop. It’s okay if…you sometimes mix up your priorities. It’s okay if…you didn’t say the right thing. It’s okay if…you really fucked up the first time around. It’s okay if…you fucked up the second time […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired


Jun 23


Why Rule Breakers Run the World

Jun 23, 2010

I’ll admit it–I’m a tad embarrassed. I can’t decide if I’m embarrassed in light of the nonchalant display of nudity that is currently lounging alongside of me–quite proudly, and with reason, if I do say so myself–on this clothing optional beach, or if I’m embarrassed for another reason–perhaps at my own relative prudishness, something that […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired


Jul 18


The Real Value of Travel (Come Sneak Away to the Beaches of Costa Rica, If You Dare)

Jul 18, 2010

A Sexy Story With a Lesson We sit in near silence, the only interruptions being an occasional mojito-induced outburst of nervous laughter, the sound of my silver chandelier earrings gently clinkering together, and the relentless tropical rains that steadily pelt the top of the canvas roof of the 4×4 automobile we are in. It’s shamelessly […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired


Apr 29


Need a Quick Laugh? Here You Go. (Open Me, Jerk!)

Apr 29, 2012

Before I explain the origins of this remarkable photo, I’m pretty sure we should think up some awesome captions together. I’ll go first. Anything but Donkey Kong! Too many boobs! Stop tickling me, Rudolph! Father Time eats his first pot brownie. Protesting razors since 1000 B.C. Don’t ask me why I have the need to […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired


Jul 20


Stay Foolish. Stay Wise. Have CONFIDENCE.

Jul 20, 2012

Rules–particularly the dogmatic variety–are most useful for those who aren’t confident enough to make their own damn decisions.   For the rest of us, there’s vodka–so we can cope with the decisions we were foolishly wise enough to make.   So help us, Grey Goose.   Amen. -Excerpt from my forthcoming book, The Middle Finger […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired


I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

Enter your email address and I’ll send you my advice column every week sharing everything I’ve learned—and so much more.

But no serial killers. I promise I won’t send those.

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