ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

Learn More >>

On Becoming Unfuckwithable

In: Finding Your Voice

Unfuckwithable.

If you're contemplating themes for the New Year, I highly recommend borrowing this one.

Rolls right off the tongue and deep dives directly into your ovaries. But more importantly? We need this.

We need this because there are always going to be days—weeks, months, years—where everything feels hard. There are always going to be people who do wrong by you, emails you don't want to answer, decisions you don't know how to make, money you don't know where to find, surprises you wish never came, the weight of the world pressing and pressing and pressing, and one more reason why you just couldn't get to it yet.

Something will always go wrong.
Websites will break.
Launches will suck.
Creativity will stagnate.
Humans will disappoint.
You'll disappoint yourself.
And you will get TIRED.

But, that's okay. It's all okay. And I'm writing this message to tell you that the answer isn't to do what you've always done and bury your head in a hole. The answer isn't in retreating from the world. The answer isn't in saying “fuck it.” The answer is becoming unfuckwithable, so no matter what happens—because something will always happen—you will figure it out. You will always land on your feet. And you will always outsmart the bullshit in this world.

A long time ago, I was forced to become unfuckwithable when I was just a young girl. Later on, I became even more unfuckwithable when I started my own business. Later again, when I started this blog. The last couple of years have proven me to be more unfuckwithable than ever. And now?

My ovaries are downright intimidating.

But, things weren't always this way.

I used to be incredibly naive and gullible. I used to cater to everyone around me, trying to be agreeable and helpful. I used to want to be “one of the girls” and be on the same page as my friends. (Jobs! Marriage! Babies! Houses! Stability!) I used to do whatever other people expected of me—including society.

But then certain things happened beyond my control, and slowly but surely, I discovered the beauty in not giving a damn. At first this felt irresponsible, but there's an unspoken power in not apologizing all over yourself. The ocean doesn't apologize for rising and falling (and then rising again); it isn't ashamed that one day it's turquoise and another it's deep blue. It just is. And its matter-of-factness is what makes it a powerhouse. You recognize it, and you act accordingly, because you know the ocean isn't fucking around. How nice would it be if people thought of you that way?

That's unfuckwithable.

It's knowing what you want, going out there, and making it happen—and not apologizing for being unconventional or making mistakes or having to ask one more time, or for doing it in the first place. You just areUnfuckwithable is making your own opportunities instead of waiting for someone to give you one. Unfuckwithable is building your own doors—and then knocking on them. Unfuckwithable is what happens when you believe that your work matters. And unfuckwithable is an attitude.

As you prepare to start a new year, a new chapter, a new plan, a new everything…I wanted to gift you my story of how I used a blog to escape rural poverty, travel the world, make my first million, land a book agent, get harassed by TV producers, work whenever I want, drink the finest champagne, build a career I love, and, slowly but surely, became unfuckwithable.

It's the MP3 audio version of a talk I recently gave at a university…and I hope that it helps you become even just a little more unfuckwithable this year, no matter who you are. (Considering that the first words out of my mouth are, “I can't believe they're letting me anywhere near a microphone,” that should be some indication of how fun this was.)

Click Here to Listen to The Talk

To becoming unfuckwithable,

Ash

Jun 8

2017

A Tiger Doesn’t Ask Permission of the Gazelles to Sprint

Jun 8, 2017

Stop giving a shit about the stats. So you don’t have any subscribers? Who cares—you don’t need subscribers to put your best work out into the world. You don’t even need a website. Just start. Surprise—I’ve had a few thousand people unsubscribe since I started doing daily emails. Guess what? I’m doing it, anyway, full […]

In: Finding Your Voice

READ ME >>

Aug 12

2017

A Note of Support for All My Dreamers Getting Their Ideas Pooh-Poohed By Their Family, Their Friends, Their Spouses, and Their Neighbors (Fucking Neighbors, Am I Right?)

Aug 12, 2017

In the year 2010, friends would call and say: “So, how’s your blooooooooggggggg?” The tone was obvious: How’s your cute little imaginary friend that you think is going to save you from the real world that the rest of us have to suffer through? The year 2011, I made $103,000 with that blog—a far cry […]

In: Finding Your Voice

READ ME >>

Mar 20

2014

I Brought 20 Hookers to Central America on Business.

Mar 20, 2014

I sloshed on yet another layer of gloss, steering frantically with one hand while trying not to rear end a truck full of cows. I mean, what would I tell the Life Hooky group? “We didn’t pick you up at the airport in San Jose because, see, there were these cowsssssss.” Even I would think I […]

In: Finding Your Voice

READ ME >>

Aug 15

2014

How to Be the Most Confident Person At The Table

Aug 15, 2014

When somebody doesn’t buy from you, which are you thinking? “Man, I’m a loser”  or “Man, they’re a loser.”  Getting cocksure is the very first order of business. And if you don’t feel sure of yourself, you know what you need? Not more clients. You need to sit your ass down, read 100 books, grovel for the […]

In: Finding Your Voice

READ ME >>

Dec 3

2010

The 67 Emotions of Unconventional Success: My Story

Dec 3, 2010

OBLIVIOUS When tears silently fell from Elizabeth’s cheek upon finding the note from her lover, 3 days before their daughter was born that read:  “I’m sorry. I can’t do this.” ASHAMED When classmates asked where my daddy was. I lied & told them he was Crocodile Dundee, and had to be in Australia to tame […]

In: Finding Your Voice

READ ME >>

I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

Enter your email address and I’ll send you my advice column every week sharing everything I’ve learned—and so much more.

But no serial killers. I promise I won’t send those.

Privacy Policy Info Here