ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

Learn More >>

You Can’t Sell Tickets to The Titanic if You’re Marketing it as a Rowboat

In: Online Marketing

Like it or not, people do judge a book by its cover. And that cover happens to include the words on the front.

There's a palpable difference between the words, “hire me” versus “engagement fees.” There's also a difference between “buy now” and “apply now.” (Even though those “apply now” snobs drive me insane.) And there's a difference between, “Cost: $5,000” and “Cost: $1,000 deposit to get started today.”

People spend so much time painstakingly slaving over their business models, their offerings, their processes, their projections—but they're all too quick to brush off the packaging as a superfluous extra—something that they'll “figure out later” because in the meantime they just want to “get it out there.”

What they don't realize is that they're shooting themselves right in the big, Devil-Wants-to-Wear-Prada toe. Yes, there is value in “shipping.” Yes, there is value in getting it out there. Yes, there is value in failing early and failing fast, as they say.

But you can't sell tickets to The Titanic if you're marketing it as a row boat.

Labels do matter. How you word it matters. What you say about it matters.

You could write the next Great American Novel, but if, once you're done, you just slap any old title & description on the front–“A Good Book, by You,” expecting the content to sell itself while you crack a beer, you're going to be in for a rude awakening. (And probably a rude hangover.)

A much smarter and much more profitable strategy is to figure out how to package your product first—What's your angle? Where's the catchy concept? How can I make this memorable, soundbiteable and exciting?—and then work backward from there. It's how books like Eat, Pray, Love get the publishing deal, sell the movie rights, and then end up having Julia fucking Roberts ride a cute little bike with a basket through a god damn rice paddy AS SHE PLAYS YOU IN REAL LIFE. Sure, the book is good. But the packaging? Is why it really sells.

Another example: Let's say you're a masseuse. (Man could I use one of you right now.) Instead of advertising yet another “Swedish Massage,” re-package that service into one called, “OVERWHELM BE GONE: A Specialized Massage for Stressed Out Business Owners Who Work Hunched Over the Computer All Day.” Or one called, “ATHLETE'S FOOT: A massage for sports enthusiasts who beat on their feet.” Or maybe one called, “MOM'S REVENGE: The massage for moms who need me-time.”

You'll help the right clients feel like they won't accept any other massage except the one that is just so perfect for them…even if the standard Swedish Massage is the exact same massage.

It's not about the product. It's about the package. Because the package is the product.

And more and more, as the world of e-commerce grows and everybody including your grandma has a website, your words are your package. And the last thing you should ever do?

Is leave them for last.

Nov 9

2012

Call Your Fucking Tribe. (Quickie Friday Piece of Ass)

Nov 9, 2012

For my WRITERS–at heart, by trade, or in their wildest, rowdiest, wettest dreams. Because it’s Friday. And this short video will be the most important thing you do all day. (You can’t fool me – I know nobody’s really working.) This is why I do what I do as a copywriter. This is why the […]

In: Online Marketing

READ ME >>

May 15

2012

Houston, We Have a Problem: Nobody Cares About You.

May 15, 2012

So here’s some Tuesday tough love (which is not even a category, but I’m making it one today): You know why you’re not making the money you want to be making? Getting the clients you want to be getting? And/or living the life you want to be living? Do you know why? The reason is […]

In: Online Marketing

READ ME >>

Feb 12

2013

7 Companies Doing Personality RIGHT.

Feb 12, 2013

Remember that one time every single day when I talked about how giving your business a personality will help you earn trust, differentiate yourself, and sell more to the right people? (As long as you don’t own a funeral home. That could be a tricky one.) Well guess what? It’s your lucky day because…I’m going […]

In: Online Marketing

READ ME >>

Mar 30

2011

Making Money As an Act of Philanthrophy

Mar 30, 2011

Because quotes are sexy. And so is money that feels good to make. BE SOMEBODY. “You want to be rich in order that you may eat, drink, and be merry when it is time to do these things; in order that you may surround yourself with beautiful things, see distant lands, feed your mind, and […]

In: Online Marketing

READ ME >>

Jan 21

2014

You are not anyone’s only option. (…So now what?)

Jan 21, 2014

We made out for hours that night. College kids stepped clumsily around us, spilling their beer as much as their morals. It was an era of chunky blonde highlights and boot cut jeans, tanning beds and lacy little lingerie tops from Express. My favorite was champagne & cream colored. I had it on that night. […]

In: Online Marketing

READ ME >>

May 19

2017

Businesses Are Like Books: The Best Ones Actually SAY Something

May 19, 2017

The best books are those that say something. That make a statement. Draw conclusions. Make connections. Contribute something new to the discussion. Otherwise, what’s the point in writing it? I think we can all agree that nobody wants to read book after book that regurgitates the same exact thing that they’ve read before. The same […]

In: Online Marketing

READ ME >>

I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

Enter your email address and I’ll send you my advice column every week sharing everything I’ve learned—and so much more.

But no serial killers. I promise I won’t send those.

Privacy Policy Info Here