ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

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If You’re Resenting Your Work, the Answer is Always Murder

In: Feeling Disillusioned With Life

Procrastination is the earliest sign.

Then comes disdain.

When you physically cannot bring yourself to do the work, just one more minute, that’s when you know you have no other choice.

You. Must. Murder.

Murder your own success. Murder your resume. Murder your reputation. And murder everything that feels like a heavy leaden weight on your shoulders.

Burn it right down to the ground, and don’t worry about regrets. Because none of it this worth it if you have to give up the one good thing that life gives us all a chance to have: joy.

Chase the child’s delight.

And chase it urgently, with the kind of importance you reserve for emergencies. Because make no mistake, your contempt for your own life is a crisis.

The good news, however, is this: There is so much unexpected wisdom in the crevices of your mind, where your thoughts go to whisper, “I wish.”

Apr 30

2018

If You Feel Like a Big, Fat Imposter Who Doesn’t Deserve Anything and Worries About EVERYTHING, Read This. It’s a GOOD Thing.

Apr 30, 2018

I’m writing this from a place that could almost be mistaken for the Italian countryside, were I not surrounded by lizards and toucans and bullfrogs the size of a fucking dinosaur. Rather, I am high up in the hills of Central America overlooking the Costa Rican valley from my squishy, pancake lounger—it sort of reminds me of […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired, Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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Jan 23

2019

OH, NO, SORRY TO DISAPPOINT. All Fucks Are Currently on Backorder. We’ll Alert You When This Item Is Back in Stock.

Jan 23, 2019

So there’s this tall, spiky, sassy-ass house plant on my balcony—the thing looks like a punk rocker troll, or maybe a pile of swords, planted upright. (Scratch that, it’s definitely a pile of middle fingers. Oh, how apropos! THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING.) Anywauurrrrryyyyy, if I don’t water this motherfucker for just one day. Just ONE day. All […]

In: Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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Jul 23

2017

Prayer for a Modern Girl

Jul 23, 2017

Her face is soft and at ease; serene and unhardened. She looks at the world through fresh, rosy eyes, while her lips unravel themselves easily at the sight of a stranger. Who are those who hold bitterness in their hearts? She walks past Round Pond, befriending the crisp July air, twirling twigs between her fingertips, […]

In: Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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Jan 7

2014

You Are Not a 7-Eleven.

Jan 7, 2014

“People need to understand what the fuck BUSINESS HOURS mean. I’m not 7-eleven, folks. I am not. If I wanted to be, I’d just run a 7-eleven. Big Gulps all the fuck around.”– Got that email from a frustrated business owner yesterday. I laughed so hard I almost spit wine on my bed. (I said almost. […]

In: Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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Nov 7

2017

Stop. Just Stop. Stop the Overdelivering, Overcommitting, Overworking, Overexertion. Because Overwhelm? We’re Over YOU.

Nov 7, 2017

You’ll let people down, okay? It’s part of it. You can’t avoid it. It is actually, physically impossible for you to be everywhere and do everything and be everything to everyone with a plate of fucking cookies in your hand.  (BUT NICE TRY, THOUGH.) Doing one thing that matters to you *requires you* to stop […]

In: Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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May 11

2017

Burnout Doesn’t Come From Your Business

May 11, 2017

At one point or another, you’ll question your work. You’ll question what you do, and whether you like doing it, and you’ll wonder if you’re on the right path, after all. At one point or another, you’ll be convinced that you hate your work. You’ll be disappointed by clients, discouraged by logistics, and burnt out […]

In: Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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Nov 27

2017

Self-Care Isn’t Always Glamorous.

Nov 27, 2017

Sooooo, it’s the holidays, and you know what that means? We all need to figure out how the hell we’re going to take care of our drooling, forgetful, overwhelmed selves, come the new year. (Oh, you’re not drooling and forgetful? GET OFF MY YARD.) Which brings up the topic of self-care. Jesus christ we’re bad at […]

In: Feeling Disillusioned With Life

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I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

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