It's here! It's happening! The moment that my eleven-year-old self and my cat* have been waiting for for years and years and years and years!
THIS COMING FRIDAY MORNING AT 6:24AM EASTERN, we'll be kicking off a very special insider's-only pre-order campaign for THE MIDDLE FINGER PROJECT book right here in your inbox—so get ready, team Middle Finger Project, because it's time to make some noise and show the world who we are and what we're made of! (Which, for the record, is not ham. Though it might be after Thursday.)
(Wait, time out: are you a turkey person or a ham person on Thanksgiving? I've heard some over achievers do both. [glares suspiciously])
Important and cool and exciting!!! >>> There will be an option to pre-order for you as an individual, and a separate option to pre-order as a gift for your girlfriends—complete with autographed “book plate insert” containing the author signature and personalized message of your choosing—so keep this in mind for a super unique and special holiday prezzie when you're thinking about your girlfriends who (circle all that apply):
- Swear just as much as I do
- Love the fuck out of books
- Would get a kick out of whatever inside joke you want me to inscribe 🙂
- Hate their jobs
- Are in the middle of a big life transition
- Aren't sure what they want to do next
- Feel kinda sorta dead inside
- Know they want something else but…what?
- Feel like they've lost themselves
- Don't have any passions anymore
- Need a big sister
- Are thinking about going freelance, or starting their own Etsy shop, or trying to do *something* creative that they enjoy
- Feel trapped in a small town / loveless marriage / uninspired career
- Need some holy roller repellent on their coffee table
- Are fun, happy-go-lucky spirits who would totally love it
- Need to believe in themselves again
- Grew up broke and/or in a trailer park (I'm going to gather you ALL under my wing—WATCH ME)
- Have a sense of humor
- Are hard to shop for
- Are someone you need a small & thoughtful present for that isn't totally cliche (like a Yankee candle)
- Is someone you actually want to give the finger to in a subtle, classy way ?
- Will think you're a total badass for having A CONNECTION WITH THE AUTHOR and getting them an exclusive signed “book plate,” made out special for them
More details and instructions to come on Friday, but the general gist is: GET EXCITED, THIS IS GOING TO BE HILARIOUS, WE ARE COMING FOR YOU.
Well, not you you, but the world you. Know what I mean?
*Oh, and by the way. I don't really have a cat but I kind of wish I did.
THANK YOU FOR BEING HERE AND SUPPORTING THIS WHOLE FUCKING THING AND ME AND MY IMAGINARY CATS. Talk to you on Wednesday—I've compiled a special fun little thing for us, muahahahaha, you are going to die.?
Love and Writers Tears Whiskey (unofficial sponsor of this entire book launch),
P.S. Writers Tears should totally be our sponsor! If you know anyone at the company…;)