ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

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The Three-Word Trick for Giving Your Content an Insta-Boner (Ooohhh, She Said The B Word!)

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

By “insta-boner,” of course I mean something much more polite, like “oomph.” But who uses the word “oomph” these days? It's completely out of the question. So, I thought I'd go with boner. There we have it, I've officially topped myself in the vulgar department. But, hey, this is how you write for the Internet: you grab people's eyeballs and jiggle 'em around a little bit.

AS WE WERE SAYING, writing something that other humans don't want to vomit all over is an important consideration these days, because as the good lord tells us: CONTENT IS KING. Yes, that's what they say. And you know what? I say that shit, too. I say it in my sleep, I say it in my prayers (just kidding, as if), I say it in my blog posts (which I am never going to stop writing, ever, ever, so you can stop wishing on a vodka-flavored star).

If content is king, then what I'm about to tell you is the king's viagra. Turns out, there's a handy little three-word trick that you can use that will instantly make all of your content swoon-worthy. Are you ready for it? It really is just THREE WORDS. Don't blink, or you might miss 'em.

Ready?

The three words that will give your content an insta-boner are:

You + We + Our

BEHOLD:

There are twenty-four instances of YOU + WE + OUR in this one little instagram post by my dear friend, Jamie Varon. Not coincidentally, she is also kicking ass on the Internet as a writer. She ALWAYS has. Because you know why?

Jamie Varon understands that her writing isn't about her.

Notice, no where in this one post do you see the word, “I.” Nor in this one. Nor this one. Nor this one. Nor the majority of anything that Jamie posts. Because her writing isn't about her experiences; it's about what her experiences mean for the rest of us.

This is the entire point of the Internet, after all: to make connections. To reach across the screen and say, “I see you.” To help lead the way for others; teach them what you know, to give the gift of reflection.

And guess what? When you show up in earnest, it won't just be your writing that gets turned on: it'll be your reader. And dare I say it, but that, friends, is the real climax of your work.

Jul 15

2014

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“No, I don’t want to be in your tribe. I’m not your minion, and I’m not a cow.” -@ateegarden on Twitter. The internet popularized the concept of “finding your tribe,” and while Seth Godin’s book by the same name is right on the money, the term itself has become cliché, stale, trite, boiler plate, and fucking offensive. …As […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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2015

The Real Trick to Brilliant Writing

Jul 20, 2015

You know what makes for brilliant writing? Not what you say, but the way you say it. The execution. The way you jockey your message onto a page. There are 354 different ways to tell any story. (Exact figure, give or take a few thousand or so.) You can start at the beginning, or you […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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2013

Why Your Writing Sucks.

May 31, 2013

There’s a lot of horse shit going around the internet these days about “writing from the heart” and eliciting emotion in your readers/audience/customers/landlords. Okay, so not landlords. And you get it. You know it’s important. Because nobody wants to buy from a faceless mime. But what you don’t know is how to actually do it. […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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Jun 28

2016

How to Be Interesting As Hell On Paper

Jun 28, 2016

Agency. It was one of the first things my book editor said to me. “These parts need more agency.” And I obviously said: Like the CIA? And she said: Shoot me. And I said: Is that a CIA joke? So while furiously drinking wine and researching this new writing foe—agency—I had been delighted to discover […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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Jan 30

2014

Why Screaming Won’t Get You Heard.

Jan 30, 2014

You know when you’re in a group of people… …and you start telling a story, and that one jerkoff starts talking over you, hollering at the waitress mid-sentence, or answering the phone, or by turning to say something to somebody else, and then all of the sudden you don’t really know if you’re suppose to […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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Feb 15

2013

25 Words That Will Make You Seem Bland, Useless, Stale, Dime-a-Dozen, Washed-Up and Otherwise Uninteresting, Unimportant and Not Worth Paying Attention To

Feb 15, 2013

If you want to stand out, feel fresh, appear interesting and get noticed… …then you’ve got to use language that stands out, feels fresh, is interesting and gets noticed. This is common sense, but of course, it’s easier said than done. It’s tempting to use the first words that come to your mind, but usually? Those […]

In: Creative Writing for the Internet

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I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

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