ASH AMBIRGE

Author, CEO & Founder

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Defiance or Defeat? You Pick.

In: Finding Your Voice

Sometimes, the shit hits the fan.

Sometimes, you find yourself living out of your car, storing all of your toiletries in an oversize red purse, lodging sweatshirts in between head rests and sunroof panels to block the windows so you can sleep, explaining to unsympathetic credit card companies that you can't pay your $41 minimum payment because you've got negative $12 in your bank account, having borderline nervous breakdowns over what Equifax is going to have to say about all this, showering once every other day whenever someone is kind enough to let you use their water, subsisting on coffee and McDonald's Snack Wraps, and finally starting to grasp why the homeless have a reputation for being alcoholics.

Sometimes, the shit hits the fan, and you can't seem to reach the plug, so all you can do is duck and then curl up into the fetal position, and hope it doesn't hit you too hard.

Sometimes, the there's going to be a whole bunch of obstacles and challenges that feel almost as if there's an evil man with a curly mustache and maroon-colored, 1980's style gym shorts in the clouds whose sole job is to make your life hell and watch with delight as you struggle to manage while he slowly sips on a vat of Banker's Club brandy from a gaudy crystal glass.

Sometimes, it's going to seem that bad.

Sometimes, it's going to feel impossible.

Sometimes, you're going to be launched into a bout of despair.

Sometimes, NOTHING.  WILL.  SEEM.  FAIR.

Sometimes, everything will seem bleak.

Sometimes, everything will BE bleak.

And you'll be angry.

And it will break your heart.

And you'll start to question everything about yourself.

Your intelligence, your choices, your dreams, your LIFE.

You'll wonder:  Am I fooling myself?  Who am I to have such big aspirations?  Obviously I'm not good enough, or I wouldn't be living out of my car, eating McDonald's snack wraps and having delusional thoughts about men in maroon-colored gym shorts.

And–dammit!–you'll start to withdraw.  You'll start to step back from the war against mediocrity.  You'll feel intimidated, and then you'll feel petrified, and THEN you will let those feelings decide the outcome of your life.

DO NOT LET YOURSELF BECOME A VICTIM OF YOUR OWN INSECURITIES.

Because sometimes, you've just got to pick yourself up off the bar floor with all your might, use all of your remaining energy to dust the empty peanut shells off your jacket, and GO AT IT AGAIN.

This is not a post about imagining the silver lining.

This is about taking the sharpest knife you can find, cutting through all of the bullshit, and yanking that lining out with your bare hands.

That's all that we can do.

So,

Be confident in your quest.

Be arrogant when it comes to your desires.

And be downright defiant when it comes to adversity.

There is no other way.

 

Aug 15

2014

How to Be the Most Confident Person At The Table

Aug 15, 2014

When somebody doesn’t buy from you, which are you thinking? “Man, I’m a loser”  or “Man, they’re a loser.”  Getting cocksure is the very first order of business. And if you don’t feel sure of yourself, you know what you need? Not more clients. You need to sit your ass down, read 100 books, grovel for the […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Sep 1

2017

The World’s Funniest Fucking Soaps, Uh, Ever

Sep 1, 2017

You should know that I have officially discovered THE BEST THING THAT’S EVER BEEN MADE (after Cards Against Humanity, of course) and I had to share with you because I don’t keep anything from you (except for that one thing) and because we could all use some inspiration and also because CAN WE JUST LIGHTEN […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Dec 30

2015

On Becoming Unfuckwithable

Dec 30, 2015

Unfuckwithable. If you’re contemplating themes for the New Year, I highly recommend borrowing this one. Rolls right off the tongue and deep dives directly into your ovaries. But more importantly? We need this. We need this because there are always going to be days—weeks, months, years—where everything feels hard. There are always going to be […]

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Jul 31

2014

Anytime You Question Yourself, Promise Yourself Better Answers.

Jul 31, 2014

You ever do that thing where you’re about to start that business, write that book, ask for that advance, release that product, pitch that service, or maybe just tell your boyfriend you want to try anal…and then you hesitate? Flinch? Get nervous? Worried? Scared that the response is going to be something like, “WHAT ARE […]

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Oct 26

2017

Sometimes, Being Difficult Is an Act of Devotion

Oct 26, 2017

Nobody wants to “be difficult.” Those words have stigma tattooed right across their rear. Just hearing them makes you think of that psycho in line at the grocery store, berating the cashier for not accepting her expired coupon. (She’s also wearing Uggs, for the record, and DEFINITELY has a soggy cigarette hanging out of her […]

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Aug 25

2017

The Competition Doesn’t Have Sh*t On You

Aug 25, 2017

There’s never been a person who went to school for accounting and said: BUT WAIT, I CAN’T BECOME AN ACCOUNTANT BECAUSE OTHER PEOPLE ARE ALREADY DOINGGGGG THATTTTTTTTTTT. There are plenty of people out there doing exactly what you want to do—times eleventy thousand. “But there are already so many writers / designers / candlestick makers” […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Jan 14

2016

Sometimes in Business, You Need to Do YOU.

Jan 14, 2016

The dead horse of the decade is the target customer. You’re asked to create personas. Put yourself in their shoes bras. Get inside their head. Imagine what’s keeping them up at 3 o’clock in the morning. (For the record, it’s that their ass is getting fat and they totally forgot to make cookies for their […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Dec 31

2010

Resolutions Are For Chumps. I Choose Revolution.

Dec 31, 2010

All the things you think you need this year, you don’t. You do not need more determination.  You do not need more discipline.  And you certainly do not need more diligence. Are you kidding me? You are a Westerner–you’ve got plenty of that.  Why else have you gotten up every single day and begrudgingly gone […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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Apr 5

2012

Fuck Plan B. You’re on the A Team.

Apr 5, 2012

His name is Oskar. He’s Rastafarian. I met him when I first came to Costa Rica in 2004 and watched him trying to sell his paintings day after day on the beach, sweating, struggling to speak English to the tourists who passed by, working from dusk until the wee hours of the night to make […]

In: Finding Your Voice

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