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Surprise Yacht Party, And You’re Invited. (Bring Your Dancing Shoes)

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired

I hope you're not disappointed; today, you'll find no bold claims, lofty theories, societal questionings, smart ass commentaries or any other typical Middle Finger Project topics.  We'll save those for Monday.

Today, we're gonna have a little party.  Right here, right now.  Go ahead, crank the Spice Girls.

Just kidding, because the Spice Girls wouldn't be played on a yacht, and that's exactly where this imaginary party of ours is taking place.  Yes, a warm ocean breeze caresses your face, as you take a sip of your Dom Pérignon (that's right, you're a baller), and sashay on over to the shrimp cocktail.  It's a black tie event, and you can't help but admit that you're looking rather attractive.  Alright, so you're looking extremely attractive.  Props.

Wait–was that P. Diddy who just landed on the helipad?

No, that's actually me. Because this is my fantasy party and clearly I'd be the one landing on the helipad.  Although Diddy is more than welcome.

But why are we having an imaginary lavish yacht party, you ask?  Good question.  The short answer?  Because I can't afford a real one. (Yet.)  However, if I were to have the means to throw all of the readers, supporters, followers, fans and FRIENDS of The Middle Finger Project a real lavish yacht party, I would.  Because you deserve it.

I wanted to make this an exclusive post for you all today, giving my utmost sincere thanks to each and every one of you.  I cannot tell you how humbled I've been since I began this website back in November, and I owe its climbing success to its readers, who are, without a doubt, some of the most badass, top-shelf people around.

You guys have given me your time, your attention and most of all, your encouragement, for which I am endlessly grateful.  Every time a comment is made on a post, I recognize the time that you've put into constructing it–especially considering the thoughtful, in-depth nature of most of them–and I truly cannot thank you enough.  You guys make me excited to leap out of bed every morning, and that's no exaggeration.  (Is it too soon to pronounce my undying love for you?)

So with that, this toast post goes to you.

From my heart,  thank you. 

Now drink up–it's open bar!  (But be careful not to fall over the side, because, frankly, that would suck.  And I have no idea how to drive a yacht in a straight line, let alone make a U-turn.

Jan 24


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It’s 2:42 in the morning and the reason I’m awake is called CHARDONNAY. People talk about getting old—buying crock pots, nonchalantly cutting your spouse’s armpit hairs, relating more to The Golden Girls than The Gilmore Girls—but they do not prepare you for the one thing that will change your life even more than tiny packets of GrillMates: […]

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It’s okay if…you’re drowning in self-doubt. It’s okay if…you don’t know where to start. It’s okay if…you started, but want to stop. It’s okay if…you sometimes mix up your priorities. It’s okay if…you didn’t say the right thing. It’s okay if…you really fucked up the first time around. It’s okay if…you fucked up the second time […]

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Where’s Your God Damn Pineapple?

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There’s always a reason why you shouldn’t. Shouldn’t spend the money. Shouldn’t be so frivolous. Shouldn’t miss work. Shouldn’t be irresponsible. Shouldn’t act so hastily. And a million other reasons why you shouldn’t do what you’ve been wanting to do. The real question, of course, isn’t whether you should or you shouldn’t. Because when it […]

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Why Rule Breakers Run the World

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I’ll admit it–I’m a tad embarrassed. I can’t decide if I’m embarrassed in light of the nonchalant display of nudity that is currently lounging alongside of me–quite proudly, and with reason, if I do say so myself–on this clothing optional beach, or if I’m embarrassed for another reason–perhaps at my own relative prudishness, something that […]

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When Being in Control is a Disservice

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I’ve got little patience for excuses. I proactively call myself out whenever I catch myself making excuses in order to either procrastinate or invent reasons why I shouldn’t put myself out there. Why? Because sometimes, putting yourself out there is nail-bitingly, blood-curdingly, will-drive-you-to-drink, flat-out terrifying at times. It’s far easier to continue doing what we’ve […]

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You Aren’t Obligated to Be the Same Person You Were Five Minutes Ago

May 1, 2017

So often, we make choices based on “what feels right for us.” To most people, that sounds like sage advice. You’re “being true to yourself,” after all. What we don’t consider, however, are the limitations. If you’re constantly making decisions based on who you are in this very moment, you don’t leave any room for […]

In: Feeling Dead and Uninspired


I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

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