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Key to Money-Makin’ Bliss: Don’t Just Sell Your Stuff. STRUT Your Stuff.

In: How to Sell Yourself

We need to talk. (Did you just cringe a little?)

Don't worry.

I'm not breaking up with you.

What we need to talk about are your selling strategies.

One of them in particular. The one where you kind of just throw something up for sale and hope like hell someone buys it. (We've all been there, but you can't stay there.)

Scenario 1

::  You decide to create a new service that you're really excited about offering to the world, so you plot out the details, spend a few hours making the best sales page you can make, sit back with your cup of hot cocoa…and then hit publish.

You hope someone sees it, and hires you.

When they don't, you get frustrated and down on yourself, and you can't figure out what went wrong. You assume they don't need what you have to offer…so you go back to the drawing board. Again. You feel like you're spinning your wheels, and never getting anywhere. You're devastated.

Scenario 2

::  You decide to write that eBook you've been itching to get out of your system, so you come up with an outline, and then spend weeks and weeks, or maybe months and months writing the best damn eBook you can possibly write…and then hit publish.

And you hope someone sees it, and purchases it.

When they don't, you get frustrated and down on yourself, and you can't figure out what went wrong. You assume they don't need what you have to offer…so you go back to the drawing board. Again. You feel like you're spinning your wheels, and not getting anywhere. You're devastated.

Scenario 3

::  You decide to offer an online workshop that you think will really take off, so you figure out all of the technology you need, all of the material you hope to cover, and what you want to charge…and then you hit publish.

And you hope someone likes it, and signs up. Hell, you hope many someones like it and sign up.

When they don't, you get frustrated and down on yourself, and you can't figure out what went wrong. You assume they don't need what you have to offer…so you go back to the drawing board. Again. You feel like you're spinning your wheels, and not getting anywhere. You're devastated.

I have good news, and I have bad news. Which do you want first?

What's that? You want the good news first?


The good news is that it isn't you. 

The bad news, on the other hand, is that you just don't know how to sell you.

It's the difference between two boxes with the same exact contents inside–let's say the contents happen to be a super duper, fance pants, high-tech blender.

Both boxes contain the exact same blender inside.

The box on the left is a cardboard box plainly labeled “blender.”

The box on the right, however, has super duper fance pants packaging and printing, with sexy photos of the blender and the perfect sales pitch highlighting the right benefits and features, making anyone with a smoothie fetish go absolutely gaga.

And that's the difference between you and the next guy–you're equally good at your craft (you're the exact same blender), yet he's rolling in sales while you're barely scraping by.

It's not because he's better than you–it's simply because he's got better packaging than you.

He knows how to sell himself better than you, because he's got a few tricks up his sleeve that you might not know about.

(On that note, I'd like to add here that yesterday, I purchased one tube of toothpaste over another, because the one I purchased described its flavor as “Kiss Me Mint,” while the other was just “Mint.”  The way you present + position yourself and your product MATTERS when you want them to buy from you–and not the next guy.)

So now, let's take it a step further.

Let's imagine you both have the same fance pants packaging, and you're starting off on a perfectly even keel. Now who's going to have more sales–you or him?

The answer:  Whoever is able to make people buy TODAY.

Here's the thing–when given the choice to buy today or tomorrow, most people will pick tomorrow. That's just how it is.


You need them to buy today. Because too often, tomorrow never comes. And then neither does your sale–even when what you had to offer was a perfect fit for them.

Whommp whommmp whommmmmmmmmmp.

So, how do you encourage them to buy today?

You make 'em an offer they can only get today.

People *hate* to have regrets. And if they know that tomorrow, they might be kicking themselves for passing up  something great you offered them *today*, they'll buy today.

Even if they weren't planning on buying today. Or buying what you have to offer at all, frankly.

You aren't the only one who procrastinates, dahling. Your customers do, too.

It's your job to help them not.

Jul 28


If You Don’t Feel Comfortable Saying, “Step Right Up and Try My Milkshake, Folks!” There Might Be a Problem With Your Product—Not Your Confidence

Jul 28, 2017

Small soft chocolate lady was my favorite. She’d arrive in a sand-colored pick-up truck; a small one, I’d say, for a pick-up truck in Susquehanna County. She’d dismount as if she were in a rush, though I knew she was only going back to the grocery store she owned. I’d have her cone ready by […]

In: How to Sell Yourself


Apr 18


Don’t Beg for Business. Command It.

Apr 18, 2013

Bring me to your granny’s birthday party, and I’m sweet as a lemon square. (My favorite.) Bring me to meet the parents, and I’ll bust out the pearls. Bring me anywhere, and you’ll get sweet, demure Ashley. But bring me to a board room? And it’s shark time. If you’re like most people, the mere […]

In: How to Sell Yourself


Feb 11


STOP Giving Away Free Consults. I Beg You.

Feb 11, 2014

“Nobody ever paid top dollar for a cheap imitation. Don’t let somebody else’s business move dictate yours.” I wrote that in our TMF Facebook page yesterday. Here’s why: Keep in mind that the people you’re watching are winging their next move just as much as you. Yet, so many new business owners who are fighting tooth […]

In: How to Sell Yourself


Dec 15


List Your Prices (THE RIGHT WAY) (Calling All Photographers.) (Hedgehogs Welcome, Too.)

Dec 15, 2011

As an entrepreneur, sometimes you fall flat on your face. Figuratively–and, apparently, literally–namely when you’re traveling in the South of Chile pretending to be in better shape than you actually are while attempting to jump over pathetically small streams that you really should be able to fucking clear, but somehow, don’t, and manage to fall flat […]

In: How to Sell Yourself


Mar 13


This Bastard Was Getting Paid $10,000 a Month.

Mar 13, 2015

This bastard was getting paid $10,000 dollars a month. He was on contract with my company at the time, brought on as a consultant to work directly with a young (and far less wrinkley-lipped) yours truly. This was some ten plus years ago, mind you, at a time when things like blogs were for morons who liked […]

In: How to Sell Yourself


Nov 6


“We Don’t See You Fucking Up As Much as YOU See You Fucking Up”: My New Podcast Interview with Jess Lorimer on Selling Yourself Bravely

Nov 6, 2018

For a long time, I declined all podcast interviews. Not because I am a grade-A, melodramatic recluse, but because I wanted to give ALL of my attention to THE BOOK.  …And then Jess Lorimer came along. And she asked me to talk about selling yourself like a pop star. And she did so with her […]

In: How to Sell Yourself


Aug 30


$5 Discount or $5 Surcharge?

Aug 30, 2017

Would you rather get a $5 discount or receive a $5 surcharge? It’s the same change in price, just framed differently—and yet, I bet even the word “surcharge” just had you up in arms. LISTEN HERE, AT&T!!!!!!!!!!! That’s because humans are reeeeepulsed by the idea of losing something we already have. It makes us hangry. […]

In: How to Sell Yourself


Dec 9


Running a Holiday Sale? Memorize This by Heart.

Dec 9, 2014

So the other day I’m Christmas shopping here in Costa Rica, which is automatically hilarious because, first of all, because they spell “Ho Ho Ho!” like “Jo Jo Jo!” which never gets less funny, and second, because Santa was dressed in a royal blue suit. (I still haven’t decided if this is posh or ridiculous, […]

In: How to Sell Yourself


I'm a Bad Influence on Women

Hey, I’m Ash! Twenty years ago I was a small town girl growing up in a trailer park in rural Pennsylvania. Fifteen years ago, I lost my family and everything I knew right as I became the first to graduate college. Fourteen years ago, I found myself leaving everything behind for a new life in the city where I could be “normal.” Ten years ago I realized normal was the most disappointing thing that ever happened to me. Nine years ago I quit my job in advertising and pursued my dreams as a creative writer. Eight years ago, I built a 6-figure business doing what I love using nothing more than the Internet and my voice. And now, today, I’m the founder of The Middle Finger Project, an irreverent media co. that helps other women find their voice and teaches them to use it to build whatever the f*ck they want to. With a book coming out with Penguin Random House in February 2020 (YASSS, WE’RE A PRODUCT IN TARGET!) I’m proud to be a bad influence on women and guide them into doing something disobediently brave with their life and their career.

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